Drunk Man Jokes

What 3 things that tell the truth?

Drunk men. Little children. Yoga pants.

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What did the pig say to the drunk man?

Licence and registration please.

Why could the drunk man only move left?

The officer hadn't read him his rights.

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Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

Why can't Irish do trigonometry?

They can't tan. Why can't Christians do trigonometry They can't sin. Why can't the rest of us trigonometry Just cos.

What's the difference between St. Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?

Everyone pretends to be Irish on St. Paddy's Day.

Licence Jokes More Licence Jokes

Why do you need a licence for a dog and not for a cat ?

Cats can't drive !

What did the pig say to the drunk man?

Licence and registration please.

Officer Jokes More Officer Jokes

What did the Officer say after arresting the crooked cook?

I just booked a cook for cooking the books."

What's the hurry?

Me: Nothing officer - Just didn't want to slow you down. Cop: I was pulling you over. Me: Well I get that. Now.

Bet Jokes More Bet Jokes

How many Mexican clowns can you fit in a car?

No, seriously. Cuz I bet it's a lot

Why was Phil Collins... ...never a good betting man?

Because he always went Against All Odds.

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What soft drink do pigs like best?

Root beer.

Why do pigs like February 14th?

They get lots of Valenswines.

Soccer Game Jokes More Soccer Game Jokes

How did the drunk Irish man lose 30$?

He bet 10$ on the soccer game and 20$ on the replay.

Why did the turkey get ejected from the soccer game?

He had tripped a fan.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why did the Mexican lorry driver lose his job?

He ate his tacho.

How did Chad Kroeger lose a quarter?

Everyone who bought his tickets wanted their nickelback

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What will never be read in braille?

Do not touch.

How do you read the Gospel According to Shrek?

Open your bible to Psalm BODY ONCE TOLD ME