Bet Jokes

Whats the best way to stop a runaway horse?

Bet on it.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why was the lion alone and disheartened?

He lost his pride in a bet

What's a good pickup line in a New Age bar?

I bet it's really nice to be Enya.

Why should you never bet on Germany at the Olympics?

They have the worst track record for finishing a race.

How many Mexican clowns can you fit in a car?

No, seriously. Cuz I bet it's a lot

What do you want to work on today?

Well we did neck day yesterday, and the day before. "So...neck day again" You bet

How many women does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know, but I bet we could pay them less than a group of men for the same amount of work.

How hard do you think Joe Biden laughs when a senate's bill gets 69 votes?

I bet he has to leave the room.

What gets wetter the more you dry?

A woman on a tumble dryer! (Bet you thought I was gonna say 'a towel', didn't you, silly redditors )

What do you give an alligator who is having trouble hearing?

A gator-aid. Bet you did see that one coming:P

Why did did the convicts escape?

Billy Eichner has a theory... Billy Eichner says I bet those escaped convicts are going to see Ted 2.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why was Phil Collins... ...never a good betting man?

Because he always went Against All Odds.

How did the drunk Irish man lose 30$?

He bet 10$ on the soccer game and 20$ on the replay.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why do they want to change the faces on dollars but not on coins?

Because the only constant is change.

Why did the chicken cross the road half way ?

He wanted to lay it on the line !

Muslim Jokes More Muslim Jokes

What is the only alcoholic beverage Muslim extremists are permitted to drink?

Smirnoff ISIS

What do you call a drunken Muslim?

A: Mohammered.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What would Marilyn Monroe being doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the lid of her coffin.

What is science?

Student: Me Ma'am! Me! Teacher: Ok Pedro! What is science Student: science is our Lesson for today.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

Why do whales have really good immune systems?

They consume a lot of vitamin SEA!

What do you get when you mix a Mexican and an octopus?

I don't know, but it sure can wash a lot of dishes.

69 Jokes More 69 Jokes

What's the hardest number to say?

70 because after 69 your mouth's full.

Why can't Kermit and Miss Piggy count to one hundred?

Because every time they get to 69, Miss Piggy gets a frog in her throat.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why won't the Alzheimer's patient pay attention to you?

Because he doesn't know the time of day.

When does a dyslexic person know they've bought the wrong SUV?

When they're in Denali.

Good Pickup Line Jokes More Good Pickup Line Jokes

What is the best pickup line for Rwandans?

Congratulations! Your parents survived the genocide!"

What's my best pickup line?

Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?

Involve Jokes More Involve Jokes

Why aren't people afraid to submit reposts?

Because there's no karma involved.

What jokes do you know that can only be understood if you know two (or more) languages?

Like a joke that involves a pun on a word that has different meanings in different languages. Please tell us what languages they are in.