Flat Jokes

Where does a two dimensional man live?

A flat.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Why did the boy who rode his bike over a barbed wire fence miss his music lesson?

Because he'd already done the sharps and flats.

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Run Jokes More Run Jokes

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because he can't run home

What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller?

Curses! Foil again!

Excuse Jokes More Excuse Jokes

Why should I excuse your dear aunt Sally?

Her operations were not unprecedented.

What did the pony say after he coughed?

Excuse me, I'm a little hoarse."

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

Why did the raisin take the prune to the new year's ball?

Because he couldn't find a date!

Why did the chicken dance with a fig?

It couldn't get a date.

B Jokes More B Jokes

What do you call an someone who's an itch that begins with a B?

Brash.

Why couldn't the Mexican be a Firefighter?

Because he didn't know the difference between Jose and Hose B.

Understand Jokes More Understand Jokes

What did the doctor say to the man who walked off the roof of his house?

I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation.

Why do Soviets use lowercase letters?

Because they don't understand CAPitalism

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

How did the blonde burn her nose?

Bobbing for french fries.

What happens when someone spills really hot coffee on you?

You will get burned, you idiot.

Toddler Jokes More Toddler Jokes

What does a toddler get drunk off of?

Jack Danimals!

What's the difference between a toddler and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would let a bag of cocaine fall out the window.

Breast Jokes More Breast Jokes

What do a chick and KFC have in common?

Once you're done enjoying the legs, thighs and breasts your left with a greasy box to stick your bone in.

What does a woman and KFC have in common?

By the time youre finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.