French Guy Jokes

What did one French Guy say to another French Guy?

Bonjour, je m'apelle Guy aussi!" ("Hello, I am called Guy as well!")

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What do you call a french guy wearing sandals?

Felipe Flop

What did the French guy say when he forgot to tell his driver to turn left?

Oh, gosh!

What did the French guy say when a bird pooped on him?

I have Grey Poupon me

How did the french guy feel when he got hit by a piece of bread?

He felt pain.

What did one dehydrated French guy say to the other?

What do we do now, Pierre

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Pain Jokes More Pain Jokes

What is the life motto of a Frenchman?

No gain no pain.

What is a french bakers lifestyle like?

Its a life of pain

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

Why do Democrats push for more gun control?

Because they can't stop shooting themselves in the foot.

Why did the kid fall out of the tree?

I shot him Why did the second kid fall out I stapled them together Why did the third kid fall out Peer pressure

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What do frozen beer, a burnt pizza, and a pregnant woman have in common?

An idiot who forgot to take it out earlier.

What's the difference between a cigarette and my exwife?

Cigarettes don't scream when they're burning.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why did the scale not wear any of his shirts?

Because they all had a tare

What type of jeans do the Mario Brothers wear?

Denim denim denim

Ash Jokes More Ash Jokes

What happened to the man with two wooden legs whose house burnt down?

He fell on his ash.

What did 1 volcano say to another volcano?

That ash.

Push Jokes More Push Jokes

How many retards does it take to push a bus?

Just one. They're retardedily strong.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing?

Jimmy pushed her... Which is a shame because she was getting used to swinging without arms.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why does my van have windows?

I want to make my victims feel like they have a chance.

What is the last thing you want to hear after blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson' Credit: old joke via: Norm Macdonald

Sound Jokes More Sound Jokes

What sound is emitted by a drowning mathematician?

log log log log log log log log log...

What sound does a cow make?

Sssssssss....