Heart Attack Jokes

Why do women live longer than men?

Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

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Who do you call if Everlast is having a heart attack?

Eminem.

Why didn't the American get the burger?

because the heart attack got him first.

What is the worst time to have a heart attack?

During a game of charades

What happens when an American has a heart attack and survives?

A 'murical.

Where does it hurt?

Me: *Points to heart* Nurse: Awwww that is so cute! Me. *COLLAPSES FROM HEART ATTACK*

Why did the black man have a heart attack?

afrosclerosis

When is the worst possible time to have a heart attack?

When you are playing Charades.

What will he have?

Student: "A heart attack."

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What do you call 2 medics?

paramedics

What do you call two healthcare professionals hanging out?

A paramedics.

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

What's the hardest part about working as a nurse or doctor at a women's hospital?

When you ask the patients "what's the problem " They'll say "nothing"

What do Hillary supporters call their room mate?

Nurse.

Recommend Jokes More Recommend Jokes

How did Eddard Stark get his daily recommended amount of fiber?

Raisin' Bran.

What haircut did the Texan barber recommend when asked?

He couldn't think of anything, and said "I'll mullet over"

Shopping Jokes More Shopping Jokes

Where did the ghost go shopping?

At the BOO-tique

Where does a Sith Lord do their shopping?

The Maul.

Survive Jokes More Survive Jokes

How are college students like plants?

They both need natural light to survive!

What do u call a Mexican who survives a shootout and lives to tell the tale?

The Juan who lived.

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

Why do Pillows work?

Cause they're white

What do feminists and Redditors have in common?

They both have multiple triggers that will cause them to down vote those who don't think the exact same way as them.

Black Man Jokes More Black Man Jokes

What does BMW stand for?

Black man working

How do we know Adam &amp Eve weren't black?

You ever tried taking a rib from a black man

Burger Jokes More Burger Jokes

What's the difference between a white girl who likes to tan and a burger?

They both need to be flipped every 10 mins, but only one turns pink when its done.

Why do burgers laugh when you surround them with pickles?

Who knows - maybe they're picklish!