Eminem Jokes

Who do you call if Everlast is having a heart attack?

Eminem.

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Why was dyslexic Eminem put in a cage?

He was startin' to feel like a rap dog, rap dog.

What is Eminem's favourite food?

wraps

Why did Taco Bell hire Eminem?

Because he's a Wrap God

What kind of dinosaur would Eminem be?

A veloci-rapper. What about Stalin? A Tyrant-a-saurus rex.

Why did Eminem make a terrible barista?

Because he kept insisting everyone only get one shot.

When does Eminem leave school?

Aftermath

What happens to Eminem when he dies?

I accidentally this joke the other day. Do you think it has potential?

What did Eminem say when his label spelled his name wrong?

It doesn't Mather.

What is Eminem made of?

He is made of Mathers

What does Eminem and a Tumblr SJW have in common?

See they can trigger me, but they'll never figure me out"

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What's a rapper's favorite candy?

Eminems.

Why are most rappers afraid of vending machines?

Because eminem's in there (Sorry, it works better when it's spoken)

What did Eminem learn to defend himself?

Marshall arts.

What part of the body did the chiropractor fix when Eminem came in?

Shady's back*

Why did Bin Laden listen to Eminem?

He was an Afghani-Stan.

Why was Osama Bin Laden obsessed with Eminem?

He was an Afghani-Stan.

What are 5 "Ms" from Detroit?

GM, Eminem and Michael Moore.

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Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

Why did the operation Barbarossa fail?

The supreme commander didn't have the balls required.

Why did the horse fail German?

Because he could only say, "neighn!"

Mather Jokes More Mather Jokes

What is Eminem made of?

He is made of Mathers

What did Eminem say when his label spelled his name wrong?

It doesn't Mather.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of chocolate swims in the ocean?

scubGodivas.

What kind of music does a factory worker listen to?

Industrial Metal

Saurus Jokes More Saurus Jokes

What do you call... What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?

A doyouthinkhesawus (saurus)!

What kind of dinosaur would Eminem be?

A veloci-rapper. What about Stalin? A Tyrant-a-saurus rex.

Vend Jokes More Vend Jokes

What's black and steals your change?

Vending machines.

What's the best machine at the gym?

The vending machine.

Shot Jokes More Shot Jokes

What do you get when you go to a concert in Paris?

Shot.

Why don't anti-vaxxers hang out in bars?

They're afraid of the shots.

Aftermath Jokes More Aftermath Jokes

What do mathematicians call retirement?

Aftermath

When does Eminem leave school?

Aftermath

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

Why shouldn't you laugh when a black man falls off his bike?

It could be your bike. EDIT: Spelling.

How do you spell "Pringles" in Spanish?

Pringls