Henry Viii Jokes

What do you get when you cross Henry VIII and Vlad the Impaler?

Executed.

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Which hand did Henry VIII use to wipe his bottom with?

Anne Boleyn's.

What do you call the vehicle used to carry Henry VIII's second wife to the hospital?

An Anne-Boleyn-ce.

What's the correct what to enter a Henry VIII convention?

You just Amblein.

Why was the ghost of Anne Boleyn always running after the ghost of Henry VIII ?

She was trying to get ahead !

Why did Henry VIII have so many wives ?

He liked to chop and change !

How does Henry VIII like his coffee?

Decap.

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Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What's the best thing about being born on 9/11/99?

You had the two biggest candles on your second birthday.

How do you know your boyfriend loves you?

SECOND PIGLET: He signs his letters with lots of hogs and kisses.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get if you cross a dog and a sheep ?

A sheep that can round itself up !

What do you get if you cross a Rhinoceros, an elephant and a helicopter?

HellIfIknow

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What do you call a nosy hot pepper?

Jalapeno business! ha ha.. haha.. ha love this joke (Usually accompanied with three snaps of the fingers in the shape of the letter Z and moving my head from side to side)

What's the difference between a carpenter and a construction worker?

30 IQ points. This, as any carpenter will tell you, isn't a joke.

Room Jokes More Room Jokes

What did you just say!?

I recommend an immediate heart attack and let the paramedics carry you out of the room.

Which room will you be working out in?

Me: None of them, I just need to take a shower.

Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

Why can't I have coffee?

Me: It'll make u even more energetic than u already are 7: But u drink it all the time& u never have energy!

Where did Nicholas II of Russia get his coffee?

Tsarbucks.

Carry Jokes More Carry Jokes

Why do buzzards prefer to fly?

Because they really like their carry-on..... yeah total dad joke, i know.

Why does Axl Rose love to carry around The Scarlet Letter?

Because every Rose has its Hawthorne

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why Cant Coffee Shops Spell Correctly?

When asked for his name by the coffee shop clerk, my brother-in-law answered, Marc, with a C. Minutes later, he was handed his coffee with his name written on the side: Cark.

Why does Helen Keller play the piano with only one hand?

Because she uses the other one to sing.

Decap Jokes More Decap Jokes

How does Henry VIII like his coffee?

Decap.

How does the executioner like his coffee?

Decap