Ion Jokes

What did the detective particle say to the suspect particle?

I got my ion you.

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What do you call an ion that also raps?

Fluoride, duh.

What did the atom say when it lost an electron?

I better keep an ion that.

How does a physicist exercise?

By pumping ion!

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

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How do you get spiderwebs out of your hair?

Asking because Spider-Man... I mean... Just asking.

What did Ryu say when I asked if I could have some of his food?

SHORYUKEN***

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What's a prison executioners favorite beer?

Shock-top

Who's there ! Alec ! Alec who ?

Alec-tricity. Isn't that a shock !

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How many reindeers does Santa Claus have?

Santa Claus has 10 reindeers according to the song.

How Many Russians Does It Take To Invade Crimea?

None according to the Russians.

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How can you tell which end of a worm is which ?

Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs !

What did the gamer wife told his gamer husband after they got divorced?

Good support in-game, bad in giving child support. gg no re

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Why did they skip Windows 9?

Because 7 8 9!

What do women and stones have in common?

You skip the flat ones.

Li Ion Jokes More Li Ion Jokes

Why did the lead acid battery have to tell the truth?

Because if it didn't it would be Li-ion.

Why can't you trust a Lithium Ion battery?

Because they're always Li-ion!

Li Jokes More Li Jokes

What would you say about someone who li kes to tell cancer jokes?

That he has a sense of tumor (Courtesy of twitter.com/sorryforthelolz)

Why can't you trust a Lithium Ion battery?

Because they're always Li-ion!

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Why did the stoner admire himself in the mirror everyday?

Because he has a high opinion of himself

How do you propose to a stoner?

Marriage, you wanna