Ion Jokes

What did the detective particle say to the suspect particle?

I got my ion you.

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What do you call an ion that also raps?

Fluoride, duh.

What did the atom say when it lost an electron?

I better keep an ion that.

How does a physicist exercise?

By pumping ion!

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

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Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

When people say 'oh, you're still single?

I like to reply with 'wow, you're still married ' I'm popular.

When she read the order back to me she said, "So, you have one thick sausage, anything else?

I looked her dead in the eye and replied, "Yes, I also ordered a pizza."

School Jokes More School Jokes

What's the difference between a school and an ISIS training camp?

I don't know, i just fly the drone

How do bees get to school ?

By school buzz !

Skip Jokes More Skip Jokes

Why isn't there a Windows 9?

Hey Microsoft, why is there no Windows 9? You've given us 7 and 8, and now you're skipping straight to 10?" "Well, to be completely honest, 7 8 9."

What do women and rocks have in common?

You can skip the flat ones.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why do console gamers use their in game names in real life?

They haven't got anti-aliasing.

What should you do when your girlfriend starts smoking??

Slow down and maybe use some lube...

Accordion Jokes More Accordion Jokes

Why won't people know when you replace words with instruments?

Idk, accordion to research I guess.

What's the difference between an onion and an accordion?

A: No-one cries when you chop up an accordion.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Why did the horse stir his cereal with his hoof?

Because he wanted to feel his oats!

What do you feel like having?

Nothing."

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of music does an inspired Latin fish listen to?

Carp E.D.M. Credit to my friend for this one.

What kind of laptop calls you a thousand times?

A dell

Mermaid Jokes More Mermaid Jokes

Why do mermaids wear sea shells?

Because D-shells are too big and B-shells are too small.

What did the mermaid do last Sunday night?

A: She went to sea a movie.