Ion Jokes

What did the detective particle say to the suspect particle?

I got my ion you.

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What do you call an ion that also raps?

Fluoride, duh.

What did the atom say when it lost an electron?

I better keep an ion that.

How does a physicist exercise?

By pumping ion!

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

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Wreck Jokes More Wreck Jokes

What do you get when a short bus gets in a wreck?

Mashed potatoes.

What happens to your car insurance if you don't notify them that you've wrecked a car?

I don't know, but it's not wreck-amended.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of bird brings no babies?

A swallow.

What kind of dog can jump higher than a building?

Any kind, buildings can't jump.

Movie Jokes More Movie Jokes

What makes for a good first date?

NOT MOVIES

What movie contains the most micro aggressions?

Ant Man

Accordion Jokes More Accordion Jokes

What is big and brown and plays the accordion?

Lawrence Elk

What's the difference between an accordion and an onion?

No one cries when you cut up an accordion

Sodium Ion Jokes More Sodium Ion Jokes

What fish is made of only two sodium ions?

2 Na :D

How do you feel?

Asks the fluoride ion. "Positively shell shocked" the sodium ion replied.

Dj Khaled Jokes More Dj Khaled Jokes

What's DJ Khaled's favorite number?

11, because it has another one.

What kind of a battery does Dj Khaled use?

A Li-ion battery.

Stoner Jokes More Stoner Jokes

What do prime numbers and stoners have in common?

The higher they are, the more spaced out they get

What did one hash brownie say to the other?

We're so baked. What did the stoner say to his friend? I'm so high,I can hear the brownies talking to each other.

School Jokes More School Jokes

What did the Gorilla do with the apple he was holding in his hands?

He brought it to school and said 'An Ape-lle for the teacher!'

What's the difference between a Canadian and an American?

Canadian knows the difference between a school and a shooting range.