Literally Jokes

Why cant you trust an atom?

Because they make up literally everything

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Why are high school girls only 13, 15, or 17?

Because OMG, they like LITERALLY can't even.

What did the valley girl say when her pen ran out of ink?

I LITERALLY CAN'T EVEN WRITE NOW

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Write Jokes More Write Jokes

How do you write an essay that blows people away?

With lots of drafts

What do you call a well-written short story?

Articulette

Build Jokes More Build Jokes

Why did nVidia built the first self-driving car?

on all conditions) Because their drivers keep crashing.

What's the difference between the foundation of a building and the average Redittor?

The foundation's been laid.

Thief Jokes More Thief Jokes

What do you call a thief running down your stairs?

A condescending con descending.

Why didn't the man report his credit card stolen?

Because the thief was spending less than his wife.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How did the prof get the latin college girl pregnant?

He asked her to do an essay. Also, I'm latin

How was the beach?

You hang ten or what " No but I stabbed a couple because they kept asking stupid questions about my vacation

Supreme Liter Coke Jokes More Supreme Liter Coke Jokes

What is Kylo Ren's favorite beverage?

Supreme Liter Coke

What is Kylo Ren's favorite drink?

Supreme Liter Coke.

Odd Number Jokes More Odd Number Jokes

How many white girls does it take to change a lightbulb?

Well, it has to be an odd number, because they literally cannot even.

Why do white girls always stay in groups of odd numbers?

Because they can't even...

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why should you never trust a one armed philosophy professor?

He never mentions "on the other hand"

Why can you trust a coffee roaster?

Because he never spills the beans :-)

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What did the soap say to the hands as they were being washed?

I think we're in sink."

Why did the Soviet union fail?

Too much Stalin'. Yeah it's bad but it made me giggle when I thought of it... :P