Nice People Jokes

What's common between Canadians and Belgians?

They're mostly really nice people, but they have the French living there too.

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Why don't nice people ride the train?

Because they're usually found on trucks.

Why are terrorists so mean?

Because they don't like Nice people.

Why are Lawyers buried forty feet deep when they die?

Because deep down they're really nice people.

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Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

Which lawyers are U2 fans?

The pro bono ones

What do you call a bus full of lawyers driving off a cliff?

A Good Start.(http://www.youtube.com/watch v=obKLdou0LH0)

Belgian Jokes More Belgian Jokes

What do you call a Belgian with a cold?

Phlegmish

What's common between Canadians and Belgians?

They're mostly really nice people, but they have the French living there too.

Terrorist Jokes More Terrorist Jokes

What's the difference between a refugee and a terrorist?

I don't know. I just build the fence.

How do terrorists like their apple pie?

Allah mode.

Crash Jokes More Crash Jokes

What do you call five black cars that all crash into each other?

A three car pile-up.

What was the last thing that went through JFK Jr's mind when his plane crashed?

The console. What was JFK Jr's wife drinking when the plane crashed? Ocean Spray.

Bury Jokes More Bury Jokes

Why was everyone saying such kind, loving words to the man?

The man was a corpse being buried forever.

What do you call a waffle that's been buried in sand?

Sandiego (The first joke I ever made as a kid)

Nice Jokes More Nice Jokes

Why are terrorists so mean?

Because they don't like Nice people.

Why are socially-aware western tourists avoiding Nice, France for their late-summer getaways?

All that Muslim hatred can really run you down.

Upvote Jokes More Upvote Jokes

Whose mother likes rap music?

Yo Momma! My eight-year-old daughter wants to see how many upvotes she can get. Ten-year old brother is interested in downvotes.

What do you call someone pretending to nice to people just to get upvotes?

karma chameleon

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why are there fences around cemeteries?

people are dying to get in.

Why do people throw coins into foutains?

Why do people throw coins into fountains? I don't know, doesn't make any cents.