Paper Bag Jokes

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a paper bag?

One is made of plastic and is very dangerous for little kids to play with. The other carries groceries.

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What do you call people who worship paper bags?

Sack religious

How do you get a frog out of a paper bag?

Ripit

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Grocery Jokes More Grocery Jokes

Where do crows go to buy groceries?

Kroger

Why did the forgetful Mexican cross the road?

To get to the other side... err, no it was to pick up the laundry... nope, to get groceries? I forget.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why didn't Count Dracula get married?

He wanted to remain a bat-chelor.

Why won't the honeydew marry the watermelon?

Because they cantaloupe..

Worship Jokes More Worship Jokes

What do you call someone who has blonde hair, blue eyes and worships the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

A Pastafaryan.

What do you call someone who worships Doritos?

A chip monk.

Frog Jokes More Frog Jokes

What did one frog say to the other?

What do frogs deal?

Croakaine

Michael Jackson Jokes More Michael Jackson Jokes

What did Michael Jackson almost name his daughter?

Nata-LEE-HEE!

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a Xbox?

They're both made of plastic, and little kids turn them on.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What is not a truck crashing into people?

Nice.

Why did Microsoft name their new web browser "Edge"?

Because people familiar with the U2 guitarist of the same name are already used to long delays.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a submarine?

I've never been in a submarine.

What's the difference between Frenchmen and some toast?

You can make soldiers out of toast!

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

When is the worst possible time to have a heart attack?

When you are playing Charades.

How do you get 2 piccolos to play a perfect unison?

A: Shoot one.