Postman Jokes

What do you call a person who delivers horribly?

A re-postman. Or a re-post person if you feel triggered.

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Why didn't the internit get any e-mail?

Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.

Why do postmen carry letters?

Because the letters can't go anywhere by themselves.

What did the band consisting only of postmen call itself?

Vanmailen.

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Trigger Jokes More Trigger Jokes

Who is a Chinese feminist's least favorite Winnie the Pooh character?

Trigger.

What's the difference between a gun and a feminist?

A gun has one trigger.

Chase Jokes More Chase Jokes

What do you call 200 white men chasing a black man?

The PGA Tour.

How do I stay in shape?

I stole an ostrich, it chases me around the house all day, i hate it

Pat Jokes More Pat Jokes

Why is owning a Prius difficult?

It's hard to drive when you're patting yourself on the back all the time.

How much do you love me?

Count the stars in the sky and that's how much I love you "But it's so cloudy" *pats her on the head* Yeah I know

Deliver Jokes More Deliver Jokes

Which former pop star would be most likely to help deliver a baby?

Paula Ab-doula

What happens when a pizzaman does an AMA on Reddit?

OP delivers.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What did one flea say to the other after a night out ?

Shall we walk home or take a dog

What do you call a dog with lice in China?

Full course dinner

King Kong Jokes More King Kong Jokes

What should you do if you are on a picnic with King Kong?

Give him the biggest bananas.

Why is King Kong big and hairy?

So you can tell him apart from a gooseberry.

Retire Jokes More Retire Jokes

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger do after he retired?

He became an ex-terminator!

What did the photographer say when he retired?

I can't take it anymore!"

Mail Jokes More Mail Jokes

Why couldn't the alligator send e-mails on his PC?

Because it was on old croc.

How do long distance runners send e-mail?

On the sprin-ternet.