Process Jokes

What's the biggest difference between Intel and AMD?

How they process things.

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What is the process for a terrorist kidnapping?

Well, first Demascus, then they Baghdad!

How do you process a queue of table delete requests for an asynchronous database?

Pop, Lock & Drop It

What do you call the process of becoming an honorary Asian?

Orientation.

What do we call the process which usually happens after a company deliberately sells a misleading product to its customers?

DLC.

What do you call the process of a robot clearing its artificial nose?

An olfactory reset.

How does Sherlock Holmes go to the bathroom?

OC By process of elimination.

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Company Jokes More Company Jokes

Which company saw the end of disco coming from a mile away?

Discover.

How many people work at your company?

About half of them.

Lock Jokes More Lock Jokes

How does Steve Irwin open a lock made of tears?

With a "Cry-key!"

What did the knob say to the door?

I LOCK you a lot! yep, its corny, indeed, but... I'm tryin'! Skip

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?

Because they're both cracked!

Why didn't the NSA request AT&T's phone records?

Because they can't monitor all those dropped calls!

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What stresses fish out the most?

Current events.

What were Jesus' final words?

So long and thanks for all the fish." Edit: Everyone hates me.

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened to German Orphans after WW2?

Did they ever get back on the Reich track (I saw the post in /r/history earlier and was disappointed to find it was a serious question. I fixed it.)

What happens if an Asian gets stung by a bee?

Their GPA drops

Sherlock Holmes Jokes More Sherlock Holmes Jokes

What type of school did Sherlock Holmes go to?

Elementary :)

How does Sherlock Holmes go to the bathroom?

OC By process of elimination.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

When two ants want to run away and get married, who do they seek for help?

The Antelopes.

What did the kangaroo say when her baby was missing?

Help! My pocket's been picked!

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense ?

So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.

What's the first thing you do when attacked by a gang of clowns?

Go straight for the juggler.