Shear Jokes

What did the sheep use to shave before his wedding?

Elopping shears

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Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What's the Welsh word for shearing a sheep?

Foreplay

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Candy Jokes More Candy Jokes

What did the Israeli Prime Minister who can't say the word "and" say about candy that caused such a hubbub?

Mike Ike's are my least favorite.

What do you get if you cross teeth with candy ?

Dental floss !

Shepard Jokes More Shepard Jokes

What did the Shepard say when he saw the sheep?

I herd that!"

Why didn't the shepard cut off his sheep's wool?

Shear laziness.

Farmer Jokes More Farmer Jokes

Why did the farmer fail to bring in the whole harvest before winter frost?

He got lost in the maize.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a farmer?

A farmer shucks between fits.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What did socialists use before candles?

Electricity

Why did the hipster salmon not get to breed?

He didnt use the main stream

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

How many bitter Hillary Clinton supporters does it take to change a light bulb?

None, we've decided to let a man do the job.

How bad is the economy?

Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Today we have no cash, no hope and no jobs.

Shave Jokes More Shave Jokes

What do you call someone who has to shave 30 times a day?

A barber

Why is it easier for women to shave "downstairs" than men?

They don't have to go through as many obsticles.

Welsh Jokes More Welsh Jokes

Which member of the Bach family went to prison?

Bachgen Drwg. (it's welsh)

What do the Welsh like to do in their private time?

Oh, sorry guys. It would've been a baaaaaa-d joke.

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What did the sheep use to shave before his wedding?

Elopping shears

How do you milk sheep?

A: With iPhone accessories.