Taxi Jokes

How does a german get to the airport?

He heils a taxi!

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Why don't taxi drivers talk to each other?

They already know everything.

How do you get to Carnegie Hall?

take a taxi

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's trying to get home?

A taxi

When are you going to learn to drive?

I don't think they feel very safe in my taxi.

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Airport Jokes More Airport Jokes

Why JFK doesn't wear hats?

It is an airport.

Why did the suicidal air go to the airport?

So he could BLOW it up. Please don't hurt meh.

Bucket Jokes More Bucket Jokes

What's the difference between a bucket of blended dead baby and a bucket of sand?

I can't gargle sand.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket filled with manure?

The bucket

German Jokes More German Jokes

What kind of car did the German cowboy purchase?

Audi *tips hat*

How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

NINE!

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why did the pony have such a hard time talking?

He was a little horse

How loud can you talk?

Alcohol

Rain Jokes More Rain Jokes

What does Barbie say when the drought finally ends?

It's raining Ken, hallelujah....

Why do Italians throw pizza onto the field after they win a match?

Because they rain supreme.

Summon Jokes More Summon Jokes

How do you summon a wizard taxi?

CABRACADABRA!

What do you call a black man that summons the dead?

A Nergomancer

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why is the white girl so odd?

Because she can't even. I'll be over in /r/dadjokes if you need me.

Why did Jon Snow need a new battery?

For the watch.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Who do you call when your spacebar doesn't work?

A space engineer!

Why do people hit things (ex. TV, computer, etc.) when they don't work?

Well, it worked with the slaves.