Time Travel Jokes

What do we want? Time travel! When do we want it?

Irrelevant.

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Who says time travel doesn't exist and we can't go back in time?

America just did.

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Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

What do Lena Dunham &amp ISIS have in common ?

They both love stoning women.

What do women in the Middle East and Millennials have in common?

If they go to college, they'll probably get stoned.

Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What's the difference between a duck?

One leg is both the same.

How do you know it's safe to feed the ducks the same thing as the Canadian geese down at the pond?

Because what's good the goose is good for Merganser.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What to Australian Trains use as fuel?

Coal-Ala

What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency?

A: She turned it over and used the other side.

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

Why should you bring two pairs of pants when you golf?

In case you get a hole-in-one (stolen from some girl at school)

Why did the husband bring his wife's sick dog to the salon?

He was trying to get her pedicure.

Location Jokes More Location Jokes

What's really important to a bat when they are looking for a new home?

Echo-location, location, location (Replace "bat" with "zubat" if you wish.)

What is your location?

Me: And you're to blame 911: Pardon Me: You give love a bad name 911: I'm hanging up

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

Where do you go to meet the best fish?

It doesn't matter - any old plaice will do.

How do deaf people meet online?

Simple, they just ask "ASL?"

Exist Jokes More Exist Jokes

What belongs in the bank and doesn't exist?

My tax refund.

Why do churches ban Wi-Fi?

Because they can't compete with an invisible power that actually exists

Gun Jokes More Gun Jokes

When one gun says to the other, "Damn dude, those are some nice bullets, where'd you get them?

the second gun says, "In some old magazine I found."

What's the difference between a feminist and a gun?

Some people are against shooting guns.