Ventriloquist Jokes

How does a woman scare a gynecologist?

By becoming a ventriloquist!

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What did the ventriloquist say to their friend?

Nothing. He's mute. I don't even think he's as ventriloquist.

Why is being a politician more difficult than being a ventriloquist?

Ventriloquists have to be able to speak with their mouths closed. Politicians speak out of both sides of their mouths simultaneously.

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Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

How can you tell if a parrot is intelligent?

It speaks in Polly-syllables!

What did the guy with 6 children say to the guy with six felonies?

I don't know they were speaking Spanish.

Side Jokes More Side Jokes

Who wins?

Neither. France surrenders and Italy switches sides.

What is it called when a large piece of foliage is the same on both sides?

Symmetree.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why did the man with an electric car think he had a dual exhaust?

He drank a lot of beer. He ate a lot of beans. *You love it.*

Why do you think you'd be a good fit at our firm?

GUY WHOSE DESCRIPTION IS SO LONG HE DOESN'T ACTUALLY GET TO SAY ANYTHING:

Gynecologist Jokes More Gynecologist Jokes

What do you call a gynecologist who really loves his job?

Ovary Enthusiastic

What's the similarity between a pizza delivery guy and a gynecologist?

They both work with crust.

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Two. One to change it and another one to change it back again.

What signal tells you that a politician is lying?

The lips are moving

Close Jokes More Close Jokes

How do Jedis close their programs on a Mac?

They use Force quit.

Why did the boy close his eyes before opening the refrigerator?

He didn't want to see the salad dressing.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What can hunger do that a woman simply can't?

Drive me to the grocery store.

What did Nala tell Simba after seeing a herd of women on Black Friday?

You gotta Mufasa"

Scare Jokes More Scare Jokes

What do anime ghosts say to scare people?

Weeaboo

Why don't blind people like skydiving?

Scares their dogs.