Carve Jokes

Why did I carve a heart with me and my boyfriends initials into a tree?

To sharpen the knife

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What's the best way to carve wood?

Whittle by whittle.

How do you get 27 kids to carve a statue?

A: Have everybody chip in.

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?

They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

How do you start a stampede in Ethiopia?

Carve a turkey

What's brown and white and flies all over?

Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!

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Thanksgiving Jokes More Thanksgiving Jokes

How do you say Thanksgiving in Native American?

Last Supper

What did the green onion say to the Thanksgiving dinner?

I ain't no chive, Turkey."

Statue Jokes More Statue Jokes

What did one statue say to the other statue he hadn't seen in a while?

Statue bro?"

What did King Kong say when he saw the Statue of Liberty?

Are you my mother

Bob Jokes More Bob Jokes

How did the blonde burn her nose?

Bobbing for french fries.

What was Bob the Builder called after he retired?

Bob.

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

Whats the fastest way to a women's heart?

A Knife

How many Gordon Ramseys does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, he lets the knives do the work

Wood Jokes More Wood Jokes

What has four legs and is made out of wood?

A horse.

What wood doesn't float?

Natalie Wood.

Stampede Jokes More Stampede Jokes

What has 200 legs 50 noses and is very loud?

A herd of stampeding aardvarks!

What did the impatient cow say at the stampede?

MOOOOOOVE !

Stupid Kid Jokes More Stupid Kid Jokes

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?

They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

What do you call a stupid kid in pre-school?

Names.

Boyfriend Jokes More Boyfriend Jokes

What did the girlfriend say to her boyfriend that was bitten by a zombie?

You're dead to me"

What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

About 45 pounds. What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend 45 minutes