Collapse Jokes

What did the Mexican say when his house collapsed on him?

Hey, get off me homes !

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What do you call it when a sewer collapses on itself?

Sewercide

Where does it hurt?

Me: *Points to heart* Nurse: Awwww that is so cute! Me. *COLLAPSES FROM HEART ATTACK*

What did the engineer say to the bridge after it had collapsed?

I trussed you.

Why did it take so long to find the bodies of the black firefighters after the building they were in caught fire and collapsed?

Cause the building collapsed, duh.

When did your parents divorce?

ME: No, they were hoarders, and the second floor collapsed.

What do you get if you cross a spider and an elephant ?

I'm not sure but if you see one walking across the ceiling then run before it collapses !

What did Gorbachev say when the USSR collapsed?

So ve it."

What would George Washington do if he was alive today?

Probably get suffocated in his collapsed coffin

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Why is fishing dangerous?

Sometimes, there's a catch

What are french journalists good at catching?

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What do you call a hundred blondes stacked up on each other?

An air mattress.

Want to hear a chimney joke?

Got stacks of em! First one's on the house

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What do you get when you cross a pig and a spider?

Bacon and scrambled leggs.

What do you call a spider that wants to overthrow the government?

An anarchid.

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What happens when the USSR gets back together?

A Soviet Reunion.

Why did the USSR have such a bad air force?

They kept Stalin.

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Why did the salad cross the road?

To get away from the PETA convention.

What do you get if you cross a baby with soldiers ?

Infantry !

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Why do women live longer than men?

Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

What is the worst time to have a heart attack?

During a game of charades

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Where does a mathematician go when he gets hurt?

L'Hospital.

Why should you never shout at a pirate?

Because it hurts their buccaneers. (Sorry it's lame, I just made it up)