Disney Jokes

What do Disney and Kellogg's have in common?

They both make pop tarts.

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a Disney movie?

Disney movies can still touch little kids.

Who's Bill Cosby's favourite Disney princess?

Sleeping Beauty

What do Disney movies and coathangers have in common?

They can both bring out the child from within.

What is every young ladys ultimate Disney fantasy?

To sit on Pinnochios face and hope he tells lies.

What illness are you suffering from if you keep seeing cartoon animals who talk?

Disney spells.

What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common?

Immigrants

What have Disney and the U.K. got in common?

Both dropped the EU And screwed over a lot of people

What did Disney call their remake of Dante's Inferno?

101 damnations

Why did the witch keep turning people into Mickey Mouse?

She was having Disney spells.

What is a racists favorite Disney film?

101 Damn'Asians.

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What climate scientist does Disney follow on twitter?

The rogue one

What's a mexican's favorite Disney movie?

Mow lawn. Sorry.

Why did the Country Bear Jamboree bear blush?

Because he was a bear a-singing. ..... I am at Disney with the kids this week...

Which knee?

Mickey: Disney

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Coathanger Jokes More Coathanger Jokes

What's the difference between a potato and a vegetable...?

Not knowing how to use a coathanger...

What can bring out your inner child?

A coathanger.

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

What do black guys have that's double the size of white men and gets bigger every time they touch a woman?

A. Their criminal record

Whats the world weakest animal ?

A toad he croaks if you even touch him !

Alligator Jokes More Alligator Jokes

How can you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?

One you'll see in a while, the other you'll see later. Credit to Mitch hedburg

What do you get when you cross a child and an alligator?

An alligator.

Disney Movie Jokes More Disney Movie Jokes

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a Disney movie?

Disney movies can still touch little kids.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Disney Movies?

Disney movies can still touch children.

Illness Jokes More Illness Jokes

What is the first question you ask a baby cow, after its gotten over an illness?

How are you vealing?

What illness makes you sneeze on your laptop screen?

A computer virus!

Beauty Jokes More Beauty Jokes

What do you get when Sleeping Beauty gives a lecture... What do you get when Sleeping Beauty gives a lecture on the Northern Lights to the people of Wonderland?

Aurora boring Alice.

What kind of people have the most beautiful eyes?

Beekeepers. Because beauty is in the eye of the beeholder.

Bill Cosby Jokes More Bill Cosby Jokes

What would Bill Cosby's name be if he was Russian?

Vladimir Puddin'

Why did Bill Cosby go to Japan with a bag of roofies?

He had Jello fever!

Kellogg Jokes More Kellogg Jokes

What do Disney and Kellogg's have in common?

They both make pop tarts.

How do you know that a dinosaur ate Kel for breakfast?

Because there was a kellogg in the toilet