Exorcise Jokes

How do you exorcise a demon?

Make him run a lap then do 10 push-ups and sit-ups

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How do Catholic church priests stay healthy?

They exorcise.

What happens if you don't pay the priest who exorcises your house?

He'll re-possess it

What do you call the ghost of a dessert-chef who returns no matter how many times they're exorcised?

A boo-meringue

What do you do to get rid of an obese demon?

You exorcise him.

How did the possessed lady lose weight?

Diet and exorcise.

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Lap Jokes More Lap Jokes

How do you exorcise a demon?

Make him run a lap then do 10 push-ups and sit-ups

What's the difference between the Olympic long distance race and the Paralympic long distance race?

A lap

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

Why does Mexico always underperform in the summer olympics?

Because everyone that can run, swim or jump is in USA.

What type of government would a nation ran by Alvin and the Chipmunks be called?

A theocracy.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

for 2 weeks.

What do you do if you're lost in an Icelandic forest?

Stand up!

Demon Jokes More Demon Jokes

What do you call it when a blonde gets taken over by a demon?

A: A vacant posession.

How do you exorcise a demon?

Make him run a lap then do 10 push-ups and sit-ups

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

How much do pirates pay for corn?

A buck an ear!

Why did the janitor take early retirement?

Because he realized that grime doesn't pay.

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

Why did the hipster burn the roof of his mouth?

He ate his pizza before it was cool. (Written anonymously in the bathroom at work, a pizza joint.)

What bird can write underwater?

A ball-point Penguin!

Boo Meringue Jokes More Boo Meringue Jokes

What do you call the ghost of a dessert-chef who returns no matter how many times they're exorcised?

A boo-meringue

What is the ghost of an Australians favourite dessert?

Boo-meringue

Rid Jokes More Rid Jokes

What do you get if you cross a skunk with a boomerang?

A: A nasty smell that you can't get rid of.

What shape gets rid of curses?

A hexagon