Merry Jokes

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do you call someone who would do anything for a chocolate snack cake?

A ho ho ho. (merry xmas!)

What is the linguistic description of sentences like 'ho ho ho' and 'merry Christmas'?

They are both santa clauses.

What does Santa say when he meets your wife, your sister and your mother?

HO HO HO, Merry Christmas!

What did Pippin Took do when he was drunk?

He began to feel Merry.

What is another name for Santa's elves?

Subordinate Clauses! Merry Christmas everyone.

How to cats greet each other at Christmas ?

A furry merry Christmas & Happy mew year" !

Why can't horses fix merry go rounds?

They'd be terrified

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December 25th Jokes More December 25th Jokes

What did the strawberry say on December 25th?

Berry Christmas!

Why did Kim Jong-il die a week before December 25th?

Because Rudolph is the only deer leader at Christmas.

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What do maggots and Alabama fans have in common?

They can both live off a dead bear for years.

Why is it so expensive to live in Ireland?

Cause they keep *Dublin* the taxes.

Snowman Jokes More Snowman Jokes

How do you make a Snowman smile?

Tell him the snowblower is coming.

Why did the snowman get fired from his job?

He was a snow call, snow show.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you know if someone is a socialist?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

What did the Japanese General say to his kamikaze trainee?

Despite what everyone tells you, you'll never learn from your mistakes.

Attend Jokes More Attend Jokes

What time does Sean Connery attend the Wimbeldon?

tenish.

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake.

31 Jokes More 31 Jokes

Why do engineers confuse Christmas and Halloween?

Because OCT 31= DEC 25

How many IBM CPUs does it take to perform a logical right shift?

A: 32. One to hold the bits and 31 to push the register.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

What did the German Shepherd say at his Nuremberg trial?

I was just following odors."

Why did the programmer die in the shower?

He followed the shampoo instructions.

Year Jokes More Year Jokes

What did the blind paraplegic child get for Christmas?

Cancer. Happy new years folks!

How the hell did Caitlyn Jenner win women of the year?

She hasnt even been a women for a year yet.