Pose Jokes

What kind of yoga do you do in a casket?

Decom-pose.

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What do you call a self-referential question posing as a joke setup?

Not funny. Except in that you know, "heh, meta" kinda way. Heh, meta.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a newspaper bag?

One is made of plastic and poses a suffocation hazard to small children. The other one contains newspapers.

What did the really ugly man do for a living ?

He posed for Halloween masks !

Why did the undercover cop pose as a waiter?

So he could protect and serve.

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Newspaper Jokes More Newspaper Jokes

Why was the feminist happy when the newspaper got it wrong?

Because she enjoyed being Ms-quoted

How did the newspaper go about reviewing the opera production?

They followed Standard Opera-rating Procedure

Michael Jackson Jokes More Michael Jackson Jokes

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess?

Because he's dead.

Why did Michael Jackson always lose in a race?

Because he always came in a lil behind.

Undercover Cop Jokes More Undercover Cop Jokes

What do you call a sleeping police officer?

An undercover cop.

What does a chef call an undercover cop?

Pig in a blanket.

Ugly Man Jokes More Ugly Man Jokes

What did the really ugly man do for a living ?

He posed for Halloween masks !

What happened after the ugly man married the beautiful blonde?

They had a wedding reception.

Waiter Jokes More Waiter Jokes

Why doesn't this restaurant have any specials?

Waiter: Because nothing about this food is special.

How long will the pizza be?

The waiter replies "About 12 inches."

Protect Jokes More Protect Jokes

How is a picket fence like a mini skirt?

They both protect the property but they don't spoil the view.

How do you protect yourself from ghosts?

Hide in the living room.

Plastic Jokes More Plastic Jokes

Which is more environment-friendly: Facebook or r/jokes?

Facebook produces too much plastics while r/jokes has 100% recycling rate.

What's the expiry date on plastic?

81(http://i.ytimg.com/vi/UYwYdFdoecA/0.jpg)

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What do you call a Sith Lord who lives in the woods?

Darth Deciduous

How long does an owl live?

About six and a half books.