Report Card Jokes

How to scare parents?

Dad: "Can I see your report card, son?" Son: "I don't have it." Dad: "Why?" Son: "I gave it to my friend. He wanted to scare his parents."

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What did little John Cena say to his primary school teacher when she gave him his report card?

You can't C me!

What did the pirate get on his report card?

Seven C's

Why was the lesbian mad when she got her report card?

Cause she got a D

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Why didn't you report your stolen credit card?

Man: The thief was spending less than my wife. Police: Then why are you reporting it now Man: I think now the thief's wife has started using it!

Why didn't the man report his stolen credit card?

The thief was spending less then his wife.

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Who do blind kids boo at wrestling events?

John Cena.

What do you call an old John Cena?

John Cenile

Seven Jokes More Seven Jokes

Why is seven bigger than nine?

Because seven ate nine.

What's an Irish seven-course meal?

A six-pack and a potato

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What does a fire, flood, earthquake, tornado, hurricane, and a wife have in common?

Sooner or later, one of them is probably going to get your house.

What's the difference between life and wife's rant?

Life eventually ends.

C Jokes More C Jokes

Why didn't Anna and Elsa's parents teach them the alphabet?

Because they got lost at C.

What did C: drive say to D: drive?

Wow you looked shocked.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What haircut did the Texan barber recommend when asked?

He couldn't think of anything, and said "I'll mullet over"

Why does Bob Seger always laugh when he plays chess?

He thinks it's funny how the Knight moves.

Scare Jokes More Scare Jokes

Why did the man put a dead tiger on his lawn?

To scare off Cat burglars!

Why don't blind people like to skydive?

Because it scares the dog.

Parent Jokes More Parent Jokes

What happened to Casper the friendly ghost after his parents got divorced?

His mom got soul custody.

Why parents don't allow their children to listen to M. Jackson songs?

because they are very touching