Sleep Pill Jokes

Been awhile since I've her some priest and a rabbi jokes. Hit me with your best one! Mine: a priest and a rabbi are waking down the street The priest asks " wanna screw some kids?" The rabbi replies "out if what?"

Old Man Jokes More Old Man Jokes

What does a burning Mexican farm smell like?

Tacos. Overheard an old man telling another guy how he lost his farm in Mexico , and how the smell reminded him of tacos.

Why did the old man throw the matress out the window?

Dementia

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What is in common between a napkin and a person?

If you sleep with a person, he/she is ur nap-kin.

Who's Irish and sleeps on your porch?

Paddy O'Furniture!

Case Jokes More Case Jokes

A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.

A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.

Why should you always bring 2 pair of trousers when golfing?

In case you get a hole in one.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the burgler take a bath?

He wanted to have a 'clean getaway'.

How do you tell when a girl really wants you?

When you put your hand down her pants you think you're feeding a horse.

Cupboard Jokes More Cupboard Jokes

What did Sean Connery say when a book from his cupboard fell on him?

I can only blame my shelf. Shout out to /r/shubreddit

What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a cupboard of food ?

Snakes and Larders !sna

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

Why wouldn't you ever see a pachyderm on a civil warship?

Because an elephant never frigates. aaahhhthankyou

How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?

Step one: Open the door. Step two: Put the elephant in. Step three: Close the door.