Swedish Jokes

What's the difference between a Swedish jam band and slam dunking a baby?

One's a Swedish Phish and the other's a fetus swish

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What nationality is not quite one?

Swedish

What did the failed Swedish chef say?

All that hard Bork and nothing to show for it .

What did the Swedish chef say to his girlfriend when he found out she was pregnant?

Abort - Bort - Bort!

What hood was the Swedish cholo from?

StockHOLMES!

Where does a race on the Swedish border end at?

The Finnish line.

What do Swedish people put in their coffee?

Artifical Swedeners

How do you sink a Swedish submarine?

Knock on the hatch.

What do you call a scar left by the Swedish Chef?

A borkmark.

Why do Swedish men always have stupid grins on their faces?

Because they're stupid" said her friend.

How do you catch a Swedish fish?

With a gummy worm as bait

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Coffee Mug

Who's a good example of a Swedish Spaniard?

Per Ejemplo.

What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh?

Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.

What do Swedish criminals say when the cops are coming?

Pork! Pork! Pork!

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Scar Jokes More Scar Jokes

What song did Scar sing when he fixed his car horn?

Beep repaired...

Why's the little boy scarred for life after going to buy his mom some earrings?

He went to Jared.

Finnish Jokes More Finnish Jokes

What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?

Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!"

What does Mortal Kombat and a church in Helsinki have in common?

Finnish Hymn!

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What's the problem?

Wife: He makes friends with the strangest things Me petting a bee: You're not strange are you Alan

What's the worst part about admitting to your friends and family you play PokemanGo?

Having to admit you have autism :,P

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I wouldn't pay 50 to have a lentil on my face...

What did Will Smith's toe say to his face?

I am leg end.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get if cross a mouse woth a packet of washing up powder ?

Bubble and squeak !

What do you get when you cross menstruation and apples?

The MaxiPad

Dunk Jokes More Dunk Jokes

How do you cure the hiccups?

Dunk your head in a bucket of water and pull it out twice.

Why did the reporter only dunk chips in the middle of the dip?

He just wanted the inside scoop.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

What do pirates say when they find buried treasure?

Thanks for the gold!

Where is the best place to find hot grills?

A barbecue

Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

How did you keep from failing that?

I didn't take algebra!

Why did the dog fail his driving test?

Because he's a dog. Dogs cannot drive.