Tunnel Jokes

Why didn't George like driving through tunnels with people in his car?

He didn't want to get carpool tunnel syndrome.

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What do you get when you cross the Queen and Prince Charles?

Dead in a tunnel.

Why are New Yorkers so depressed?

Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.

What's the difference between a optimist, a pessimist and a realist?

The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. The pessimist sees nothing. And the realist sees the train.

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Train Jokes More Train Jokes

Why did Jesus have a six pack?

It was from all the cross-training...

Why don't nice people ride the train?

Because they're usually found on trucks.

Optimist Jokes More Optimist Jokes

How many optimists does it take to change a light bulb?

Who says it's dark

What's the difference between a optimist, a pessimist and a realist?

The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. The pessimist sees nothing. And the realist sees the train.

Bunch Jokes More Bunch Jokes

What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?

A bingo machine.

What's the difference between a group of pigmies and a lesbian track team?

One of them is a bunch of cunning runts

End Jokes More End Jokes

What do blind people think of a basketball?

It's a never ending story.

What did Captain Kirk find at the end of the rainbow?

a LepreKHAAAAAAN!

20 Blonde Jokes More 20 Blonde Jokes

What do you get if you put 20 blondes in a row standing ear to ear?

A wind tunnel.

Why did 20 blondes stand outside the bar?

Because you need to be 21 to get in.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why do flamingos stand on one leg?

Because if they didn't they'd fall over.

What were Adam's first ever words to Eve?

Stand back - I don't know how big it's going to get!"

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

When people say 'oh, you're still single?

I like to reply with 'wow, you're still married ' I'm popular.

Why did you do that?

I replied,"That's what you're supposed to do in soccer, right Kick balls "

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What happens when an elephant sits on a car?

It breaks the trunk.

Why can you never trust a car made in the Soviet Union?

They keep Lenin to the left, and Stalin.