Yogi Jokes

What do you call a bear who is athletically flexible?

Yogi

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What did the yogi have for breakfast?

an lette

What did the yogi say after riding his pet llama to the ashram?

Llamaste.

What did the yogi say to his friends when they asked him to leave?

Nah I'ma stay"

Why doesn't Yogi wear shoes?

He likes to go... bearfoot! I'll see myself out...

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Google Jokes More Google Jokes

Who has the better search engine: Yahoo, Google, or Microsoft?

I dunno. Let's google it!

Which internet search engine does Chandler from Friends use?

Google, like everybody does.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do you call an earl grey that likes role play?

Not-tea

Why don't asians like to applause?

Because every time they do all they do is crap

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did the rooster buy mittens?

So his chicken fingers wouldn't get cold. I'll leave now

Who fills in for the president of Russia when he's on leave?

Deputin

Nah Jokes More Nah Jokes

What did the hippie say when I asked him to leave my house?

Nah, I'm-a stay.

How many anti-feminists does it take to screw the light bulb?

Anti feminists Nah, they can't screw

Breakfast Jokes More Breakfast Jokes

What do you call a large vehicle that travels the world serving breakfast?

Universal cereal bus

What did Freddy Mercury have for breakfast?

Bacon and AIDS (I'm so sorry Freddy)

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

Why can't Iron Man stay in a steady relationship?

He has rust issues.

When I was kid, and we'd go sledding on a cold snowy day, Ya know how often I had to rub my hands together to stay warm?

Intermittenly.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What haircut did the Texan barber recommend when asked?

He couldn't think of anything, and said "I'll mullet over"

Why am I black and you're white?

A boy asks his mom, Why am I black and you're white? She says, Don't even go there. The way that party went, you're lucky you don't bark

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons ?

Because they didn't want to wait 40 years for a train !

How are bad dubstep and constipation similar?

Both leave you waiting for the drop.