Zika Virus Jokes

How did the doctor determine that the baby was affected by the Zika virus?

It was a no brainer.

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What do Catholic priests and the Zika Virus have in common?

They both give kids a little head.

What's the easiest way to get a little head?

The Zika virus.

What do the Zika virus and Catholic priests have in common?

They both give kids a little head.

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Catholic Priest Jokes More Catholic Priest Jokes

How are Chile mining companies and catholic priests different?

Chile mining companies get their minors stuck in shafts while catholic priests get their shafts stuck in minors

How many wife's does a catholic priest allowed to have?

Nun

Swat Team Jokes More Swat Team Jokes

Who do you call during a Zika virus emergency?

The SWAT team

Who do you call when theres a fly in your house?

The SWAT team

Catholic Jokes More Catholic Jokes

What's the difference between a Baptist and a Catholic?

Catholics acknowledge each other in the liquor aisle. Extra: What's the difference between Catholics and Lutherans? Catholics just acknowledge each other in the liquor aisle, Lutherans have a 15 minute conversation about booze.

Why was Jesus crucified instead of stoned?

So Catholics could do this makes the sign of the cross, instead of this bangs self in head with fists.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What did the peadophile say when he was released from prison?

I feel like a kid again

What's black and white and unemployed?

Just kidding about the white part.

Brainer Jokes More Brainer Jokes

What do you call a person with no brain?

A no-brainer

What do you call a vegan zombie?

A no-brainer.

Determine Jokes More Determine Jokes

How can you determine which of two people is a chemist and which is a plumber?

You ask them to pronounce unionize.

How did the police determine which turtle ate the diamond ring?

They conducted an in-turtle investigation.

Swat Jokes More Swat Jokes

Who do you call during a Zika virus emergency?

The SWAT team

How do you swat one hundred flies at the same time?

Smack an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

Affect Jokes More Affect Jokes

What is one item which has never been affected by inflation?

Deer's Balls There are always under a buck

Why does black lives matter affect the postal service?

They have white mail privilege.