When punching a toddler, how hard is too hard?

Calm down... I'm not talking about MY kid. I know how hard to punch her. I'm her mother.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How many stoners does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, I just set the bulb down somewhere, now I can't find it. Where the hell did the bulb go?

What rhymes with Jon Snow?

He doesn't know. , Sorry for the lame joke, just made it up.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What's the appropriate age to take the electric shock collar off your kid?

My son's 10 years... hold on... OFF THE COUCH! brb... convulsing.

Why didn't the white officer shoot the black guy?

Just kidding he did

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why are you wrapping me up like a burrito & how did you find a tortilla this big?

Me: Shhh! This is my fantasy & burritos don't talk.

What are you stupid?

That's a goat!" He says "I wasn't talking to you."

Punch Jokes More Punch Jokes

What do you call it when a horse punches you really hard?

A neigh-maker

Who was the best boxer of all time?

Jim Jones, I heard he took out 909 people with one punch.

Toddler Jokes More Toddler Jokes

What do you call toddlers who are dictators?

Dictator Tots

What does a toddler get drunk off of?

Jack Danimals!

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

What did the lightbulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.

Who Conquers All obviously, this is read in the man's grizzled voice What's the difference between your mother and a motorcycle?

When I ride a motorcycle... I wear protection.

Calm Jokes More Calm Jokes

Why are doctors always calm?

They have a lot of patients. Sorry.

Why did the pacifist /b/tard try to calm everyone down?

He did it for the