Who wants to go out to dinner and scream and cry and make daddy wish he wore more condoms?

Kids: WE DO! YAY!

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Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

Why did the biscuit cry?

His mum had been a wafer too long.

What happens to the water level in the aquarium when one of the fish dies?

It rises because the rest of the fishes are crying :'(

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How many psychiatrists does it... ...take to change a light bulb?

0, the light bulb has to want to change itself.

Which fruit wanted to run away and get married, but couldn't?

Cant-elope :D

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

What do you call a guy who screams, "I love you, mom!" every time he climaxes?

Me.

Who wants to go out to dinner and scream and cry and make daddy wish he wore more condoms?

Kids: WE DO! YAY!

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

Why are you packing condoms for a sailing trip with 10 guys?

I'm saying "Just in case." Now I'm traveling with a bigger case.

What separates the men from the boys in the Catholic Church?

A condom.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What are you wearing?

ME: *nodding and sniffing myself* Mashed potatoes with gravy.

Why don't bears wear boots?

Cos they like to walk around in their bear feet.

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What's it called when an Arabic author releases their latest novel after dinner?

Post-Hummus

What's for dinner, mom?

Cannibal kids: "What's for dinner Mom "

Daddy Jokes More Daddy Jokes

What's your Mom's name?

Kid: Mom's last name must be "Darling" because that's what Daddy calls her every time.... Teacher: That's so sweet. What's her first name then? Kid: I think it's "Sorry"....

What does a 16 year old girl say in West Virginia?

Get off me daddy, you're crushing my smokes

Wish Jokes More Wish Jokes

How many lonely guys does it take to change a lightbulb?

One. But he wishes it took two.

Why were the locals dissapointed when an old, decrepit, broken down bus rolled into an Egyptian town?

They wished it was Anubis.

Yay Jokes More Yay Jokes

What noise does a ceiling fan make?

GO CEILING!!! WHOOOHOOO!!!! YOUR NUMBER ONE!! YAY, CEILING RULES!!!

Who wants to go out to dinner and scream and cry and make daddy wish he wore more condoms?

Kids: WE DO! YAY!