Why did the man drowning in the river think he wasn't going to die?

He was in de-Nile.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do you say to a black guy selling drugs?

What did you think it would be, you racist?

What did the tired pilot say to his crew?

I think I'm gonna crash

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the man say when he got a big phone bill?

Who said talk is cheap "

What did the doctor say to the man that broke his arm?

Be patient

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did Anakin Skywalker cry out as he lay dying and on fire?

Patme! Patme! Credit to my wife on this one

Why are there no elderly people in Africa?

They all die when they turn aidy.

Drown Jokes More Drown Jokes

Why can't Ross & Phoebe ever drown?

Because David Schwimmer and Lisa Kudrow.

What do you call the man with a lisp who drowned?

A philosopher. Cuz he's a deep thinker.

De Jokes More De Jokes

Why couldn't Moses believe his mother sent him away in a basket?

Because he was in de-nile

What does Sherlock Holmes do in the toilet?

He de-deuces.

River Jokes More River Jokes

What was Roe v. Wade really about?

The fastest way to get across a river.

Why wasn't the fella able to get out when he fell in the river?

Cause it was on a Sunday and the banks were closed

Nile Jokes More Nile Jokes

Why is it really hard to convince Egyptians?

Because they all live in de-nile...

How do you entertain a bored pharaoh?

You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish.

De Nile Jokes More De Nile Jokes

Why did the man drowning in the river think he wasn't going to die?

He was in de-Nile.

Why is it really hard to convince Egyptians?

Because they all live in de-nile...