Apologise Jokes

What do you call a grandma that know martial arts?

A grandmartial artist. I apologise for any lost brain cells.

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How does Schrdinger apologise?

Sorry not sorry

How do boats apologise?

S ry!

What do you call a group of disabled people in a pool?

Vegetable soup. I apologise to those offended by my terrible joke. Have another Whats the hardest part of cooking a vegetable? Getting the wheelchair into the oven

What do you call a Russian ninja?

Shneakoff ( I apologise, this is my first ever post so I'm using that as my excuse)

Where's the best place to apologise to someone?

Surrey.

What do you call an academic who apologises all the time?

An anthropologist

How does Schrodinger apologise?

Sorry not sorry

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What's the most important meal of the day to help you lose pounds?

Brexit

Why did Oscar Pistorius lose his court case?

He hadn't got a leg to stand on.

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How do you know you're not logged into reddit?

There are posts on the frontpage

What do you call a day when all jokes on this sub are re-posts?

EVERYDAY !!

Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

Why did the Russians use peanuts for torture in the Cold War?

Because in Soviet Russia, Nut Cracks You!

Why did the chess master order a Russian bride?

He needed a Chech mate!

Academic Jokes More Academic Jokes

What do you call an academic who apologises all the time?

An anthropologist

What do you call a vessel full of academics?

A scholarship

Good Place Jokes More Good Place Jokes

Where is the best place to buy chicken broth?

at the stock market

Where's the best place to go if you want a little head?

The 2016 Olympics.

Boat Jokes More Boat Jokes

What kind of boats do smart people ride on?

Scholar ships!

How do they launch a champagne factory?

They throw a boat at it.

Religion Jokes More Religion Jokes

What religion do mosquitoes follow?

Muslim, because they go to a mosque...ito. Sorry.

Why is religion like mobile gaming?

Free-to-pray, pray-to-win.

Cerebro Jokes More Cerebro Jokes

How does Professor Charles Xavier Apologise?

He says "Cerebro"

How did one Brain apologise to the other?

I'm cerebro