Collect Jokes

How does Kurt Cobain collect his thoughts?

With a mop.

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Which Greek God loved to collect animals?

Zoos

How did the dungeon keeper plan for retirement?

Collecting stocks and bonds.

How many of the commemorative state quarters have you collected?

I have 40.

What is a Furman freshman doing when he grasps at thin air?

Collecting his thoughts.

How does Ebenezer Scrooge make phone calls?

Collect!

What has two arms and 14 legs?

Guy who collects legs.

Why did the Otter collect parts for his spaceship?

So he could go to otter space.

What am I supposed to do with this speeding ticket?

Officer, "Keep it, when you collect four of them, you get a bicycle."

What's the easiest way for a Gorilla hunter to make money?

Collect unemployment insurance!

How did rich people get their money?

They were calm and collected.

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What's a dog favourite hobby ?

Collecting fleas !

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Greek Jokes More Greek Jokes

What did the Roman say when the Greek accused him of stealing his gods?

It was all a myth-take!

What do you use to find Greek restaurants?

A gyroscope.

Addiction Jokes More Addiction Jokes

What's so weird about a steroid addiction?

No matter what happens, the addiction always makes you stronger.

What is easy to get into, but hard to get out of?

Addiction

Collection Jokes More Collection Jokes

Why couldn't the boarder throw out his collection of potted ferns?

They were his best fronds.

What do you call a collection of research and papers on a child molester?

A pedo file

Zoo Jokes More Zoo Jokes

What do you call a loaf baked in a zoo?

Bread in captivity.

Who do you think was sent to cover the story of the baby lion born in the zoo?

A cub reporter.

Iraq Jokes More Iraq Jokes

Why are there no Wal Marts in Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan?

Because there are already too many targets. (credit: some old veteran bum looking guy sleeping on a bench at the police station I went to today.)

Why do Arabs only buy Chevy Trucks?

Because they're like Iraq.

Kurt Cobain Jokes More Kurt Cobain Jokes

How does Kurt Cobain collect his thoughts?

With a mop.

Why wouldn't Kurt Cobain let you charge your phone at his house?

the guy likes his power chords too much.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did the spy cross the road?

Because he never really was on your side.

Why did the sushi cross the road?

Sushi could get to the other side.

Mop Jokes More Mop Jokes

What did the mexican boy say to his mom after he mopped the floors and found his brother?

I've cleaned up and found Jesus.

How does Kurt Cobain collect his thoughts?

With a mop.