Greek Jokes

What do Greeks use to listen to music?

Spartify

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What sound does a Greek gun make?

TZZZZAT, TZZZZZZZAT!

Why don't the Greeks, Slavs, and Armenians celebrate Thanksgiving?

Because they don't like Turkey

What do you call a stabilizing greek?

A.... GYROScope

What do Greek teenagers say?

Omega!! Note: surely it already exists but I thought of it independently and am proud of my terrible joke!

How do the Greeks seperate the men from the boys?

A crowbar.

Which Greek god was annoyed by his invitation to the Goddess Dyslexia's party?

Ares.

Which Greek God loved to collect animals?

Zoos

What do you call a Greek arsonist?

What did the ancient Greek mother say when her sons toga got torn?

Euripides, Eumenides

What did the Roman say when the Greek accused him of stealing his gods?

It was all a myth-take!

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How did the Greek army separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar

What do you call a Greek guy walking down the stairs?

Con-Descending

How did the ancient Greeks seperate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar.

Why did the Germans bail the Greeks out?

Because they took Pita on them

Why should you date a Greek woman?

They don't like pulling out.

What a greek says as he get his paycheck?

Danke Shn.

What is the difference between a Lannister and a Greek?

A Greek never pays his debts.

What do you give a Greek man with a scratchcard?

A coin to scratch it with.

What does a greek say when gets his salary?

Danke!

Why is there such a big contrast between Greek yogurt and regular yogurt?

Because they're different cultures.

What did the Catholic Mexican say to greet the Greek God of Thunder?

hey zeus!"

What do the Greeks sing while at sea?

your boat, gently down the stream...

Which Greek Philosopher was the easiest to manipulate?

Play-Doh

What did Dave Grohl say when someone stole his Greek food?

There goes my gyroooo

What do you call a Greek skydiver?

Condescending

What did the Greek God say when he could finally take the world off his shoulders?

At las!

Why did the greek philosopher break in two?

He was made out of Plato

How do you separate Greek men from Greek boys?

With a crowbar.

What greek letter is always sad?

Psi...

What happened to the Greek dairy farmer who got robbed on his way to market?

He was un-feta-ed of his cheese.

What is the difference between a Greek spearman and a pale beer?

One is hoplite, and the other a light hops.

What do you get when hou bring a Greek and a Swede together?

Moose-saka

Why were the ancient Greeks considered so brave on the battlefield?

They didn't want to leave their brothers behind.

How many Greeks does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, ......A Greek will screw anything!

How did the greeks separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar.

Why don't many Greek men move to other countries?

They don't want to leave their brothers behind

What's the motto of the Greek army?

Never leave your buddy's behind.

Why did the Greeks want Helen back so bad?

Are you kidding She was the most beautiful woman in the world! Can you imagine what her sons would of looked like

Why do Greeks like fried foods?

Because they're greasy

What did Dave Grohl say when he dropped his Greek sandwich?

There goes my gyro

How do you separate the Greek boys from the Greek men at a Greek BBQ?

With a Crowbar!!!!!

What do Greek soccer players wear?

Soccer tee's

Where do the Greek X-men sleep when camping?

Mu-tents

What do you call a routed Greek army?

A Failanx

What does a Greek man with a speech impediment say after being burgaled?

Stop those damn Thebes!"

Why do Greek men wear gold neck chains?

A: So they know where to stop shaving.

Why is yogurt always in debt?

Because it's Greek.

What did Ronald Reagan say in his presidential campaign?

Electron. Also, what did the Greek warrior say when he saw the wooden horse Hydrogen please spare me

What do you call a Greek Magician?

Abra Kebabra

How do the greek separate the men from the boys?

With a crow bar.

Why'd you call me Aphrodite?

After the Greek goddess of love" Kid 2: What about me pop "You're named after a famous chipmunk Alvin"

Why did the young Greek boy run away from home?

A: He was not being reared right!

What does a Greek say when he receives his salary?

Danke schon.

How do we know that Greek yogurt's Greek?

Because it's whey strained.

What do you call a Greek philosopher who plays hard to get?

A socra-tease Made this one up myself. I'll be here all week

Who is a Graduate student's least favorite Greek Hero?

Thesus

What Greek tragedy was written by a neckbeard?

Tips fedora "M'dea."

What do you call a Greek with a spanking fetish?

Spanakopita

What do you get when someone refuses to pay the bills?

A Greek.

Why are the Greeks so in debt?

They demand credit for everything

What do Greeks call someone when the most common consonant in their name is R?

A rho-man

What's a Greek's favorite color of sky?

Golden Dawn

When Greek people play a video game, what settings do they use?

Default

What do you call a Greek stripper?

Popalottapus

What's the difference between reddit gold and the Greek drachma?

People usually thank you for giving them reddit gold.

What are the first three letters of the Greek alphabet?

I.O.U.

What do you use to find Greek restaurants?

A gyroscope.

Why did Germany hold a ceremony for the Greek bankruptcy?

They wanted to give credit where credit was due.

What do you call it when a Greek handicap falls over?

Olympus has fallen.

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How do you separate the Greek boys from the Greek men at a Greek BBQ?

With a Crowbar!!!!!

How do you separate Greek men from Greek boys?

With a crowbar.

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Why did the blind man use chopsticks?

Because he couldn't see the point in forks.

What did Obi-wan say to Luke at the Chinese restaurant?

Use the fork, Luke.

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Which Greek God loved to collect animals?

Zoos

What did the Catholic Mexican say to greet the Greek God of Thunder?

hey zeus!"

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How many Tenors does it take to screw in a Lightbulb?

Trick Question. They only think they can reach that high.

How many Norwegians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Debt Jokes More Debt Jokes

What do you call a guy in a lot of debt?

Owen.

Why do Chemists have so much debt?

Because they have so much Antimony!

Seperate Jokes More Seperate Jokes

What seperates man from animal?

Divorce!

How did the ancient Greeks seperate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar.

Exist Jokes More Exist Jokes

How many "Mean Girls" jokes is too many?

The limit does not exist

Who picks it up?

Santa. The other two don't exist.

Thanksgiving Jokes More Thanksgiving Jokes

Why did the monster get a ticket at Thanksgiving dinner?

He was exceeding the feed limit!

How did you burn the Thanksgiving Turkey?

Me: I followed the directions. 20 minutes a pound at 325 degrees. I weigh 175 pounds!