Crime Rate Jokes

How do you lower the crime rate?

Give the criminals badges.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What's the only thing that grows in Oakland?

A: The Crime Rate!

Why are crime rates down in the US?

Because criminals keep turning themselves into police.

What's the only thing that grows in Ferguson?

The crime rate.

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Ferguson Jokes More Ferguson Jokes

Why did the Ferguson protesters go home early last night?

The whole thing was a gas.

How do you improve public transportation in Ferguson, MI?

Move the trees closer together.

Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

What did Moses say when he wanted to see through his door?

Let my peephole grow!

How did the farmer grow his portfolio?

Cornstock

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why is it hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs?

They always take things literally.

Why are fish so gullible?

They fall for things hook line and sinker!

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What did the tv say to the remote control?

you turn me on"

Why did the former fitter turned baker enter the lottery?

To win dough.

Police Jokes More Police Jokes

Why did the police arrest the sidewalk sidewalk?

It always had some sort of weed on it!

Why did the police arrest the energizer bunny?

He was wanted for several charges of battery

Lower Jokes More Lower Jokes

How many people live in the lower part of Italy?

There are literally Sicilians.

What do you like about me?

Me: Your crippling self esteem issues have caused you to lower your standards. Her: What Me: Your eyes

Criminal Jokes More Criminal Jokes

Why did you tie a rope on that criminal?

Officer: You ordered me to get a line on the suspect.

Why is it expensive to be a criminal?

Because the police charge you.