Landmine Jokes

What does a feminist and a landmine have in common?

They explode when triggered.

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What do you do if you step on a landmine?

Well standard procedure is to jump 50 feet and spread over a wide area.

What's cheaper than a wall?

Landmines.

What goes cluck, cluck, cluck, boom?

A chicken stepping on a landmine.

What's worse than stepping on a Lego in the middle of the night?

A landmine.

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Step Jokes More Step Jokes

What do you call someone you want to be stepped on by?

A crush crush

What did Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead Ant, Dead Ant....Dead Ant, Dead Ant, Dead Ant...

Chicken Jokes More Chicken Jokes

Why did the chicken limp across the road?

Because it was a lame joke.

How did the chicken cross the freeway?

You take the 'F' out of free and the 'F' out of way. Hint: say everything out loud.

Lego Jokes More Lego Jokes

What does the Lego man do for fun?

He throws a block party.

How late?

Cut to me trapped inside a tiny house made from Lego* I've no idea to be honest with you...

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

Why do the versions of Windows jump from 8 to 10?

Because no one wanted Windows Nein!

Why did the marine biologist jump off a bridge?

He lost his porpoise in life.

Boom Jokes More Boom Jokes

What's blue and square?

An orange in disguise! Boom!!!

Why is the middle east the best place to open a store at the moment?

Because business is booming.

Spread Jokes More Spread Jokes

Why did the bed spread?

Because it saw the pillow slip.

What do you do if you step on a landmine?

Well standard procedure is to jump 50 feet and spread over a wide area.

Trigger Jokes More Trigger Jokes

What happens when a feminist shoots a gun?

The gun gets triggered.

What do guns and feminists have in common?

They are very loud when triggered.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What did you call a dinosaur that keeps you awake at night ?

Bronto-snore-us !

What do agnostic, insomniac dyslexics do at night?

A: Stay awake and wonder if there's a dog