Lenin Jokes

Why can you never trust a car made in the Soviet Union?

They keep Lenin to the left, and Stalin.

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What does Lenin say when he his angry?

I will hit you so hard that it will leave a Marx.

What was Lenin's favourite film?

Tsar Wars episode III: Revenge of the scythe.

What do you call a red lemon?

a Lenin. )

What do you call it when Lenin, Trotsky, and Stalin get together for a drink?

A communist party

What are Russian clothes always made out of?

Lenin.

What score did Lenin get on his exam paper?

Full Marx

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Stalin Jokes More Stalin Jokes

Why did the Cold War never happen?

Because Joseph was Stalin.

Why did the Soviet union fail?

Too much Stalin'. Yeah it's bad but it made me giggle when I thought of it... :P

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What's better than having a 'Brexit' vote about Britain leaving the EU?

Not being British.

Why couldn't the NSA whistleblower's plane leave Washington DC?

He was Edward Snowed-In.

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

What does a terrorist and a cue ball have in common?

The harder you hit them the more english you get.

What did the cat say to the human after being hit with a baseball bat?

Nothing. Cats don't freaking talk.

Trotsky Jokes More Trotsky Jokes

What do you call it when Lenin, Trotsky, and Stalin get together for a drink?

A communist party

What do you call it when Russians get diarrhea from drinking water in Mexico?

Trotsky's Revenge

Smack Jokes More Smack Jokes

How do you fix the dishwasher?

Smack her.

How do you swat one hundred flies at the same time?

Smack an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

Score Jokes More Score Jokes

What score did Lenin get on his exam paper?

Full Marx

What do you call it when Paul scores?

Paulinating.

Marx Jokes More Marx Jokes

Why doesn't communism work in a school enviroment?

Because everyone would get the same Marx.

What grades did Fidel Castro get at school?

Full Marx

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

How do you know you can't trust doctors and lawyers?

Because they both "practice" their professions.

Why can you never trust a car made in the Soviet Union?

They keep Lenin to the left, and Stalin.