Midday Jokes

How does an Apple Watch owner know that it's midday?

It's already run out of battery.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What cuts four farts in the morning, two farts at midday, and three farts in the evening?

A sphinxter.

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Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What do men and mascara have in common?

They both run at the first sign of emotion.

What happend when the bike ran over a nail?

It popped a wheelie.

Battery Jokes More Battery Jokes

Why was the Energizer Bunny tried in court?

He was charged with battery.

Why did the police arrest the energizer bunny?

He was wanted for several charges of battery

Evening Jokes More Evening Jokes

Why are cats longer in the evening than they are in the morning?

Because they're let out in the evening and taking in in the morning !

What do elephants do in the evenings ?

Watch elevision !

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

Why do bakers start working so early in the morning?

Because they knead dough.

Why is it so hard for an eighty year old woman to pee in the morning?

Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese?!

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you get when you cross a canyon with a horse?

I don't know nobody has ever made it across.

Why did Snape stand in the middle of the road?

A: So you'll never know which side he's on.

Fart Jokes More Fart Jokes

How does Justin Beiber remove a condom?

He farts.

What do you call someone who never farts in public?

A PRIVATE TUTOR

Apple Watch Jokes More Apple Watch Jokes

What does an Apple Watch do when it gets hungry?

It goes back four seconds.

How do you know its noon on an Apple Watch?

The screen stays black when you check the time.

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What do you call a Knight that cuts beef?

Sir Loin.

What is the definition of a Barbarian?

It's someone who cuts hair in a library.