Million Dollar Jokes

What is a small loan of money?

a small loan of a million dollars"

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How do you turn a little boy into a little girl?

With a small loan of a million dollars.

How does a racist joke start?

A small loan of a million dollars.

Why did the rich man go crazy?

He had one-million dollars, but no cents.

What's the quickest way to make nine million dollars?

Date Simon Cowell.

What's the difference between a million dollar car and a pile of dead babies?

There's no million dollar car in my garage.

What is a million years like to you?

God: Like one second. Mortal: What is a million dollars like to you God: Like one penny. Mortal: Can I have a penny God: Just a second.

How does a musician make a million dollars?

They start with 2 million.

Who makes a million dollars a day?

Someone who works in a mint.

What's the easiest way to make a million dollars?

Invest a billion.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What's furry on the outside.. Wet on the inside.. Starts with a C... Ends with a T... And has U &amp N in-between?

A coconut!

How does an atheist start their prayers?

To Whom It May Concern

President Jokes More President Jokes

How many Americans does it take to screw a lightbulb?

None. Their President outsources the job to India.

Which president was least guilty?

Lincoln, because he is in a cent.

Billion Jokes More Billion Jokes

Who is the most successful liar in the world?

Mary. Lied about her extramarital affair, still believed by billions.

What's the easiest way to make a million dollars?

Invest a billion.

Dead Baby Jokes More Dead Baby Jokes

What is the difference between sack of dead babys and ferrari ?

I don't have Ferrari in my garage.

What's more fun than swinging a dead baby by a string?

Stopping it with a shovel!

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do hand grenades and wives have in common?

Remove the ring and your house is gone.

Why did the Mexican push his wife off the bridge?

Tequila

Small Loan Jokes More Small Loan Jokes

How does a blonde man get really rich,stupid and a candidate for president ?

small loan of 100 million dollars

How do you turn a little boy into a little girl?

With a small loan of a million dollars.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between E.T and illegal immigrants?

E.T actually learned English and wanted to go home.

What's the difference between Mormons and non Mormons?

The temperature of their caffeine

Musician Jokes More Musician Jokes

How does a musician make a million dollars?

They start with 2 million.

What's the difference between a musician and a large pizza?

The pizza can feed a family of 4.