Norse Jokes

What do you call a Norse god after a workout?

Thor

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Why do Norse gods never ice skate?

Because the ice always Thors.

How did the Norse god of mischief celebrate his birthday?

With a low-key event

What do you call getting a movie about Norse gods from the Internet?

DownlOdin. What do you call getting a movie about Norse gods from the Internet illegally? Thorrenting.

What did Mike Tyson ask the really tired Norse god?

Are you Thor

What did the Norse goddess say to Thor when he drunk dialed her?

I aint no Valhalla back girl."

Why don't vikings send e-mails?

They prefer to use Norse code.

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Workout Jokes More Workout Jokes

What's white and gives you a solid 9+ inches that gives you a workout every time?

Snow Storms

Why can't John complete a workout?

He tried, but it didn't work out.

Mike Tyson Jokes More Mike Tyson Jokes

What is Mike Tyson's favorite thing for a woman to wear?

Thort thorts.

What is Mike Tyson's favorite song?

Down With The Thickness.

Mail Jokes More Mail Jokes

Where does Iron man get his e-mail?

Fe-mail

How does Voldemort seal his mail?

With his Parceltongue. (...I'll see myself out)

Dial Jokes More Dial Jokes

What did the big ape say when he dialed incorrectly?

Oops! King Kong ring wrong."

Who's there ! Crock and Dial ! Crock and Dial who ?

Crock and Dial Dundee !

Ill Jokes More Ill Jokes

What do you call a pirate's helicopter?

An Eye-patchy helicopter! . Ill show myself out.

What would you do of you found Chicago, Ill.?

Call Baltimore, M.D.

Communicate Jokes More Communicate Jokes

How do turtles communicate?

With shell phones.

How do neurons communicate?

Cell phones

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

What do you get if you ask a former presidential candidate to write a piece of music about a formula for solving a problem based on a sequence of specified actions?

An algorithm.

What do young ghosts write their homework in?

Exorcise books.

Scandinavian Jokes More Scandinavian Jokes

Why was the Scandinavian atheist warm?

He had Thor doubt.

Why does Norway have barcodes on their battleships?

So when they get back to port, they can Scandinavian.