Mike Tyson Jokes

What does Mike Tyson do after 10pm?

He thlides into your DMth.

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What is Mike Tyson's favorite song?

Down With The Thickness.

Who is the only man to record more knock outs than Mike Tyson?

Bill Cosby

What did Mike Tyson say to the boy who gave him a bouquet at his final boxing match?

Tysssonssss

How does Mike Tyson get smarter?

By taking a math gainer.

What did Mike Tyson call the groom with cold feet?

A Puthy

What do you call Mike Tyson without any arms?

Whatever you want

How does Mike Tyson track Will Smith in the snow?

He looks for fresh prints.

What's the difference between Mike Tyson and the iPhone 4s?

There are no videos of Mike Tyson.

Why doesn't Mike Tyson play the Playstation?

Because he's an Xboxer.

What did Mike Tyson say when he saw Breaking Bad?

That's methed-up!

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Why did Mike Tyson bring his calculator to church?

He was invited to thunday math.

What is Mike Tyson's favorite thing for a woman to wear?

Thort thorts.

What do Dracula's girlfriend and Mike Tyson have in common?

They both go down for the count!!

What's Mike Tyson's favorite Scarlett Johansson film?

Luthy.

What's got four legs and no ears?

A: Mike Tyson's dog.

What did Mike Tyson ask the really tired Norse god?

Are you Thor

What do you call Mike Tyson on drugs?

Methed up

What did Louis Farrakahn say to Mike Tyson after the fight?

A: No stupid an Eye for an Eye!!!!

What happens if Mike Tyson carries around Mjolnir all day?

He gets thor arms!

What do you get when you mix a black man with microwave chicken?

May be offensive) Mike Tyson

What do "Jingle Bells" sung by Mike Tyson and a green and red g-string have in common?

They're both Christmith Thongs.

How do you think the unthinkable ?

With an itheberg." - Mike Tyson

How does Mike Tyson say hatred?

Hate Thread!

What is Fee Fie Foe Fum Fum Foe Fie Fee?

Mike Tyson's inmate number.

What did Mike Tyson say when asked about the time he fought the God of Asgard?

The loser was 'thore'"

What did Mike Tyson say when he saw mold?

That's growth.

Why couldn't Mike Tyson go to the laundromat?

Because it was clothed.

Why does Mike Tyson refuse to buy playstation ?

Because he is an x-boxer

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How do you spot Will Smith on a snowy Christmas morning?

Look for Fresh Prince

Why are there so many Smiths in the phonebook?

Because they all own telephones

Thickness Jokes More Thickness Jokes

What is Mike Tyson's favorite song?

Down With The Thickness.

What is the volume of a pizza of thickness A and radius Z?

PI Z Z A

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Ray Charles and Ray Rice?

Ray Charles wasn't a one-hit wonder.

What's the difference between David Blaine and the NRA?

The former has a cunning array of stunts

Record Jokes More Record Jokes

What's all this?

Bracken: Well you told me to bring all my records with me and I did. Here's some by Willie Nelson Tammy Wynette and Garth Brooks . . .

Who's Gotye?

while their kids were like, "What's a record

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

Why does Tiger Woods bring an extra pair of socks while golfing?

In case he gets a hole in one.

Why did Tiger Woods bring three socks instead of two?

In case he got a hole in one.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What did Dodi Fayed say to his driver?

Want to go out with me and Di tonight?

Why did the suicidal man cross the road?

Because he wanted to play chicken.

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you do when you stumble upon a one-armed Polish man stuck in a tree?

You wave!

What do you call an Asian lady sitting on a fence with no arms or legs?

Pai-Ling

Boy Jokes More Boy Jokes

What do Wal mart and priests have in common?

They both have boys pants half off. I'm going to hell lol

Who is that Idiot..?

If Boy is in love - His parent Ask: Idiot, Who is that Girl.. Moral :: No matter who ever is in love... Boys Are Always Idiot :P (LOL)