Ouch Jokes

What did the monitor say when it got punched?

Ouch, that Hertz!"

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What did the baby otter say when it walked into the club?

Ouch

What did the T-Rex say when he stubbed his toe?

Ouch. I'm Dino-sore!"

What would Germans call a painfully offensive joke?

Ouchwitz &gtsay ouch when offended or in pain &gtWitz is the German word for joke &gtsounds like auschwitz

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Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

What is the difference between a horse and a duck?

One goes quick and the other goes quack!

What makes cows and horses so valuable?

They have a lot of moo/neigh.

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

What do you call an English teacher five feet tall covered from head to toe in boils and totally bald?

Sir!

Why are ballerinas so vigilant?

They are always kept on their toes.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

Why did the ghost go to the bar?

For the BOOOOze.

Where did AT&T get their 2007 slogan?

Ireland: More bars in more places

Club Jokes More Club Jokes

What do animal poachers do in their spare time?

They go clubbing.

What do Tiger Woods and baby seals have in common?

They both get clubbed by Norwegians...

Auschwitz Jokes More Auschwitz Jokes

What is the worst part about going to Auschwitz?

Your dreams are not the only thing going up in smokes.

What is the most successful hotel?

Auschwitz, 6 million stars.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

Why do white girls walk in groups of odd numbers?

Because they literally can't even.

An IPv6 packet is walking out of the house.

He goes nowhere.

Offend Jokes More Offend Jokes

Why couldn't the bee dress as a ghost for Halloween?

Because people are offended by seeing Boo Bees.

What do feminists search for on scavenger hunts?

Reasons to be offended.

Hermione Jokes More Hermione Jokes

Why didn't Harry Potter want to date Hermione?

Because he likes to Hit it and Quidditch

What did Ron Weasley do the first time he saw Hermione naked?

He whipped out his wand and yelled, "***Shtupify***!".