Hertz Jokes

What did the monitor say when it got punched?

Ouch, that Hertz!"

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What did the Computer Processor say when it was overclocked?

It Hertz.

What is the problem with high frequency?

It Hertz

How does Avis feel to be #2?

It Hertz

What happens when you get hit by a rental car?

It Hertz.

How do you measure love?

In hertz!

What does an electric engineer say when they get kicked in the balls?

Owch! it hertz

What's the only painful car rental company?

Hertz.

What distance say when velocity fell on top of him?

Ow, this really hertz.

How do you measure pain?

In Hertz.

How does it feel to crash a rental car?

It Hertz.

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Measure Jokes More Measure Jokes

What do you call a scientist that measures things in space?

A cosmetrologist.

How do pirates measure rope?

In yarr'ds.

Kick Jokes More Kick Jokes

Why was the Narwhal kicked off the volleyball team?

He was always spiking the ball.

What do you call a person who doesn't care that he just got kicked out of a Call of Duty team?

unfazed*

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

What do priests and christmas trees have in common?

Their balls are just for decoration.

What does an electric engineer say when they get kicked in the balls?

Owch! it hertz

Rental Car Jokes More Rental Car Jokes

What is the difference between a rental car and a Humvee?

You can take a rental car anywhere.

What happens when you get hit by a rental car?

It Hertz.

Crash Jokes More Crash Jokes

How is Islam like a GPS?

You may think you're on the right path, but if you follow it literally, you'll end up crashing into a building.

Why did the pilot crash the plane?

Because he was a slice of bread

Ouch Jokes More Ouch Jokes

What did the baby otter say when it walked into the club?

Ouch

What would Germans call a painfully offensive joke?

Ouchwitz &gtsay ouch when offended or in pain &gtWitz is the German word for joke &gtsounds like auschwitz

Punch Jokes More Punch Jokes

When is it okay to punch a midget?

When he stands next to your girlfriend and says her hair smells nice.

What did the neckbeard say when he was punched in the throat?

M'Larynx

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens to a drunk vampire?

They get a fangover.

What happens when the USSR gets back together?

A Soviet Reunion.