Phil Jokes

What should we call this giant advertising board?

Phil: A philboard Bill: I have a better idea

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What do you call a Canadian fish with no bones?

Phil, eh?

What do you call a man in a hole?

Phil.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, lying in a ditch?

Phil

What do you call a man with no arms &amp no legs... ...hanging on the wall?

Art ...floating in the sea Bob ...laying on the floor Matt ...down in a hole Phil ...sitting in a pot Stu ...

What's the song that coldplay wrote for you?

Yellow. *Phil answers phone*

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did they have to stop playing water-polo in Poland?

All the horses drowned

How do you stop your laptop batteries from running out?

Hide their trainers.

Phil Collins Jokes More Phil Collins Jokes

Where does Phil Collins record all of his music?

The stu-stu-studio.

What's the difference between Phil Collins and Germany?

We stopped Germany.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

Whoever answers my next question, can go home One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: Who just threw that?

Boy: Me and I'm going home now.

What is the best part of the camp?

One wise guy answered 'Going home!'

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

Why was Cinderella kicked out of Walt Disney World?

Because she sat on Pinocchio's face and told him to start telling lies.

What's the best way to get King Kong to sit up and beg?

Wave a two-ton banana in front of his nose.

Music Jokes More Music Jokes

Which rock band has 4 people but doesn't make music?

Mount Rushmore

Who makes the music for the Marvel movies?

The Avengers Ensemble.

Matt Jokes More Matt Jokes

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs?

Matt

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs at your front door?

Matt

Amp Jokes More Amp Jokes

Why do Nuns always wear Black &amp?

White? No particular reason, it's just a habit they have.

How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?

None. According to Trump, they outsourced it to India & China.

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a person who is outside a door and has no arms nor legs?

Matt

What do you call 222,215 Frenchman with their arms up?

The active french armed forces.