World War Jokes

Why should we make Gabe Newell president?

There won't be any World War 3. #gaben2k16

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What did the poles do during world war two?

They held the telephone wires off the ground.

Why did both Germany and the U.S want to hire Apes during World War Two?

Because they are excellent at waging Gorilla warfare!

How do you say "whoops" in German?

World War 2

Why would Gabe Newell be a good president?

Because then World War 3 would never happen

Who should we vote for the next president?

Gabe Newell. There will never be a World War 3.

How do you get Americans to join a World War?

Tell them it's nearly finished.

What would Valve call the next world war?

A Global Offensive.

Why couldn't Germany win a world war?

Because they'd Russia lot

What do we call this war?

The World War " "No. There's already been 1 of those" "Uh this is a world war, too" *the streetlights explode*

What was Hiroshima's code name in World War 2?

Target Practice.

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Why did Europe start the first World War?

They did't like being sans-Ferdinand.

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Ape Jokes More Ape Jokes

Why did the Ape jump off the building?

He wanted to show the world the stuff he was made of!

What did the first ape that could walk say to all the other apes?

I'm walkin' here!

War Jokes More War Jokes

What do the Russians use to film their war with Isis?

Daeshcams

Why does the French flag have Velcro?

So the blue and red sections are easily removed during a time of war.

Gabe Newell Jokes More Gabe Newell Jokes

What's the difference between Gabe Newell and a toddler?

A toddler can count past two...

Why would Gabe Newell be a good president?

Because then World War 3 would never happen

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why does the Fonz dress up as an insect when going on a journey?

Because he wants to get from ayy to bee.

When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask "who's in charge of tossing the salads here?

Then I frown & order the soup.

World War 3 Jokes More World War 3 Jokes

Why should we make Gabe Newell president?

There won't be any World War 3. #gaben2k16

Who should we vote for the next president?

Gabe Newell. There will never be a World War 3.

Explode Jokes More Explode Jokes

Where did the girl go when the bomb exploded?

Everywhere.

What's the deal?

Jerry says. The Best Buy explodes

Elect Jokes More Elect Jokes

What's one advantage of electing a woman president of the United States?

We wouldn't have to pay her as much.

What do you get when you elect Bernie Sander's son as president?

A son Bern

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

Why don't they have bars in Syria?

Because, they prefer to get bombed at home.

What's the difference between drunk people and black people?

Drunk people are found bars. Black people are found them.