Xanax Jokes

Why did the Mexican take Xanax?

For Hispanic attacks.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Why didn't the Mexican take Xanax?

He was barred.

Why does the American Border Patrol guard take Xanax?

To stop Hispanic attacks.

Why does a Mexican take Xanax?

For his Borderline Personality Disorder.

What does a bartender give you when you need the feeling of a strong drink, but you're not allowed ton consume alcohol?

Xanax since he's a Bartender

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Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What emotion does a tree feel every spring?

Relief

Why'd the cookie go to the hospital?

It was feeling a little crumby.

Bartender Jokes More Bartender Jokes

Why would Bart Simpson never go to a pub?

Because there's a BartEnder there.

What do you call a bartender giving two dolphins a drink?

Serving dual porpoises!

Consume Jokes More Consume Jokes

What did the man who ate a clock say?

That was time consuming but I still want seconds.

How many fish did it take to consume my wife?

None. There are no fish under my new gazebo

Hispanic Attack Jokes More Hispanic Attack Jokes

Why does the American Border Patrol guard take Xanax?

To stop Hispanic attacks.

Why does the Mexican guy take xanax?

For hispanic attacks Edit: Happy Cinco de Mayo

Portuguese Jokes More Portuguese Jokes

How many portuguese people can fit on a scooter?

A Brazilian

Why did the Portuguese guy take Xanax?

Hispanic attacks.

Allow Jokes More Allow Jokes

What do Ryan Giggs and Imogen Thomas have in common?

I'm not allowed to tell you

Why is gambling not allowed in Africa?

Because there are too many cheetahs.

Cinco De Mayo Jokes More Cinco De Mayo Jokes

What's honey mustards least favorite holiday?

Cinco de Mayo

What about Cinco de Mayo?

USA: "What'd you just say " Nachos: "Nothing."

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Who takes the best selfies in LA?

I need someone good to do mine.

When do we need airplane noises?

NEEEEEEEEOOOOOOWWWWWWW