Which perfume do you use ?

It smells good. I want to buy one for my wife." Lady: "Please don't. Some idiot will have an excuse to talk to her."

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What is the difference between Martin Luther King Day and St. Patrick's Day?

St. Patrick's day everybody wants to be Irish.

Why doesn't Jesus Play Hockey???

Because he doesn't want to be nailed to the boards.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Which Spanish superhero has three wives?

Amor-Man

What did the rabbi say after he was diagnosed with an aggressive and inoperable form of brain cancer, and his wife and child died in a car crash while driving to the hospital?

Oy vey!"

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do somolian pirates use as weapons?

Arrrrpg's

What do you call the vehicle used to carry Henry VIII's second wife to the hospital?

An Anne-Boleyn-ce.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

How do you keep a group of women from talking?

Ask the oldest one to speak first.

What do you call a yak that wants to talk to you about a network marketing opportunity?

A cognac

Excuse Jokes More Excuse Jokes

What does the window do when the sun shines on it?

It gets Blinded I excuse myself out.

How does a chef ask to leave the dinner table?

He says, "Gourmet I be excused?"

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What does Fetty Wap buy when he goes to Walmart?

7 tees, 30 eggs

Why did it take the computer so long to decide whether it wanted to buy an Egyptian cotton sheet?

Because it had too many threads.

Smell Jokes More Smell Jokes

What's yellow and smells like a zebra?

Lion vomit.

What's long, green and smells like pork?

Kermit the frogs fingers"

Idiot Jokes More Idiot Jokes

What are you doing, idiot?

me, to other drivers on the road "What are you doing, idiot " me, to myself, in all other situations

What did the idiot do after seeing a joke that wasn't very funny?

Downvote it.

Lady Jokes More Lady Jokes

How many ladies have you slept with?

she said. I said, "Do you want me to round it to the nearest 10 " She raised her eyebrows and said, "OK..." I said, "Zero."

Why do all the ladies love Jesus?

spreads out arms to fullest length) Because he was hung like this.

Perfume Jokes More Perfume Jokes

What happened when the monster stole a bottle of perfume?

He was convicted of fragrancy.

Why do women put on makeup and perfume?

Because they're ugly and smell bad...