Why didn't you stop when I shouted at you back there?

Motorist: I thought you were saying "Good morning Mr. Mayor." Cop: Right. I wanted to warn you about going too fast through the next town.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the man drink two beers with his lunch?

Because he wanted to drink two beers with his lunch.

Why did the farmer run through his fields with a steamroller?

Because he wanted mashed potatoes!!!!

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do you get when you slice ice cream?

Slice cream! ... I think I'll join the reposting group now...

What gift would you like to receive during the St. Valentine's Day?

Well, I don't know" she answers shyly. "OK, that I give you another year to think about it..."

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop an Albanian tank?

You shoot the guy pushing it.

What can I do to stop my addiction?

She said, "Whatever means necessary." "No it doesn't," I said.

Town Jokes More Town Jokes

How do you stop an F4 tornado from destroying a town?

A roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris! However, this method will cause more destruction than the tornado.

What did the farmer say when the townspeople told him all of his cows were in town..?

I herd.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What do cats read in the morning ?

Mewspapers !

What do you call a corn farmer who wakes up one morning to find that complex branching pathways have been cut into his field?

amaized.

Motorist Jokes More Motorist Jokes

Why did you stop your car get out and yell "coward" at the traffic signal?

Motorist: The light just turned yellow.

Why are you driving on the sidewalk?

Motorist: It's too dangerous on the street.

Cop Jokes More Cop Jokes

How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: So who wants to know Why do *you* want to know Are you a cop

How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs?

None, he fell.

Warn Jokes More Warn Jokes

What do black people get on their math test?

Warning offensive!) Chicken grease.

How did the dog warn its master that a Gorilla was approaching?

He barked g-r-r-r-illa!

Mayor Jokes More Mayor Jokes

What do you call a dog who got re-elected for mayor?

A dog with pawlitical experience.

Why didn't you stop when I shouted at you back there?

Motorist: I thought you were saying "Good morning Mr. Mayor." Cop: Right. I wanted to warn you about going too fast through the next town.

Shout Jokes More Shout Jokes

What did Sean Connery say when a book from his cupboard fell on him?

I can only blame my shelf. Shout out to /r/shubreddit

What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve?

ELF NO. 2: Okay everyone sack time!!