Why's the couch smell like pee?

Flashback to me watching The Ring alone Me: *points at son* I think someone had another "accident."

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Point Jokes More Point Jokes

Why buy an invisible knife?

I don't see the point

What's yellow and always points to the north?

A magnetic banana.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

How do pirates know they exist?

They think, therefore they ARRRRRRRR!

Who do you think was smarter, Jesus or Buddha?

I mean, just in terms of not letting themselves get crucified.

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

What do a slinky and your mother in law have in common?

They're both fun to watch tumble down stairs.

Why cant you watch TV in Afghanistan?

Because of the tele-ban.

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

What did the SMG dad say to his son?

Bizon Joke by:

What did the man say to the priest at the beach?

Do you mind getting out of my son.

Ring Jokes More Ring Jokes

What did C.S. Lewis say about The Lord of the Rings books?

I don't know what you're Tolkien about!" Yeah, sorry.. I know it's dumb.

What kind of bell doesn't ring?

A dumbbell.

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

What do dads say when they see someone peeing?

European.

Who cares if you pee in the shower?

The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Accident Jokes More Accident Jokes

What do you need to teach a blonde who never had an accident in 20 years?

Second gear.

What's the difference between John Kenndy Jr. and Ted Kennedy?

Ted can swim away from an accident.

Flashback Jokes More Flashback Jokes

What'd you do this weekend?

I was shooting craps. "Oh you went to a casino " *flashback to blasting dog turds with shotgun* Um, yeah.

What were you doing?

flashback to me trying to find the actual Hogwarts* "Grad school."